


Correction of mistakes

by petta



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:35:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 29,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27960875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/petta/pseuds/petta
Summary: Jaime Lannister climbed out from under the rubble of the Red Keep, found the boat Tyrion was talking about, climbed into it, and set free the waves. He didn’t care where the waves took him. He hadn’t saved the city, he hadn’t saved his sister, he’d betrayed those who believed in him. «I should have died in this town too»
Relationships: Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth
Comments: 101
Kudos: 154





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My dear readers, at last I dared to publish my first work in English. Actually it is the translation of my first funfic published a year ago.  
> I realise my English is poor. (( So, forgive me please all the mistakes and tell me about them if you please.

Chapter 1  
Jaime and Cersei hurriedly descended down the stairs. The noise of the falling stoneы and the rustling of the dragon’s wings drove them. There was only one way to get through, and they’d be in a dungeon, and there’d be an exit to shore where the boat was waiting for them.

All of a sudden, Cersei stopped and looked into a hole in the wall. Her face was smiling.  
"It worked. Finally."  
"What worked?" - Jaime surprised. The sudden stop and change of heart of his sister frightened him.  
"Look," - she pointed towards the city.  
There was a fire raging in the city, and the red flames were burning here and there around the houses, but there were also bright green flares everywhere. And it wasn’t firing anymore, it was explosions.  
Jaime was terrified he looked at his sister.  
"Have you told them to use wildfire?"  
"Yeah. I planned things a little differently, and to be honest, I thought my idea hadn’t worked out. But it worked out spontaneously. Now the city will be destroyed."  
Jaime couldn’t believe what he heard.  
"But why? They’re ordinary people and they’re innocent."  
"They betrayed me. You heard them, they rang the bells. So let them burn! All of them!"  
The fanatical fire in his sister’s eyes frightened Jaime. He tried to appeal to her mind.  
"Listen, but you will die in this fire, too!"  
Her face was hard.  
"If I don’t rule this city, then no one will."  
They heard a rumble of rocks falling just outside. Jaime grabbed his sister’s hand.  
"Let’s get out of here."  
But she as enchanted looked at the city which lived its last moments.  
"Remember? " - She spoke to her brother in her usual voice, as if there were not any horror around, - "together we came into this world, together we’ll leave it."  
Jamie shook his head.  
"But I don’t want to." - he had something to live for. It was like he’d just cured a severe disease and tasted life. There was so much he wanted to do.

Suddenly everything was shaking and the steps between brother and sister were spreading. Jaime grabbed the railing with his left hand and reached for his sister. She grabbed his golden hand in a panic, but a huge piece of stone fell right between them, clamping Jaime’s prosthesis. He was lying in an uncomfortable position on his stomach and tried to pull his hand out from under the rock.  
"Cersei! Cersei!" - he called his sister several times. The golden hand is stuffed and Jaime has gathered his strength and pulled out his stump, leaving a prosthetic under the rock. He took a careful look behind the boulder, where his sister’s dress was visible. She was lying upside down on the steps and did not move.  
"Cersei", - Jaime called again. No response. He’d already brought his leg over to climb the boulder, but it sounded rumbling on the top, the stones were crawling thicker and thicker, it seemed he’d hit a waterfall of rocks. He should have gotten out of here as soon as possible, but he kept calling for his sister. Suddenly, like a powerful river, a stream of rocks swooped towards him and shoved him back a long way. He rolled down the stairs to a whole passage, adjusted by this stream.

He woke up a few hours later. Something heavy was lying on his chest and was blocking his breath, his lungs were covered in dust and his eyes were covered with charred blood. He barely got up.  
«Cersei!» - the first thought was in his head. His sister was supposed to be here somewhere. He headed for the stairs from which he fell into the dungeons, but they were completely covered with rocks. He tried to clear the stairs, but the stones he was cleaning were filled with new ones - the entire aisle was covered. He screamed and called for Cersei, but there was no response. He fell to his knees and cried. Yeah, she was stupid and violent and narcissistic, but she was his sister. They were always connected, and even now when he’s gone from under her influence, he felt that connection, he felt the pain she felt in her final seconds. He wanted to save her and that child in her womb, whoever he was, his or Euron’s.

There was a deep silence around, and Jaime came ashore and only now he realized why it was so quiet – there was a deep night. The stars were shining so bright and carefree, and it was absolutely the same as what happened in this world. «And so will always be, - thought Jaime, - gods do not care about stupid wars of stupid people.»  
He found the boat that Tyrion was talking about, pushed off the shore and went to the ground. Where the waves would take him, he didn’t care. He hadn’t saved the city, he hadn’t saved his sister, he’d betrayed those who believed in him. «I should also have died in this city», was his last thought before he passed out.

How many days it was before Jaime could come to his senses he didn’t know. He felt the swinging and thought: «I’m still in the boat» and went back to sleep. The images of the past appeared before his eyes, he tried to save everyone again and again, and again he found himself in the ruins and heard people screaming that they were burning alive, and felt the weight of the stone on his body.  
Finally, he could open his eyes and realized he wasn’t on the boat. Above his head, there was the boardwalk ceiling, not the sky, and he lay not on the coarse boards of the bottom of the boat, but on a ledge lined with a straw seal.  
"Have you woken up, m'lord?" - He heard a ringing voice at his feet. A girl, black, with big black eyes and a big white tooth smile, sat at the feet of his bed.  
"Who are you?" - Jaime tried to ask, but his mouth was so dry that he could only produce a wheezing.  
"Are you thirsty, m'lord?" - The cheerful girl guessed and handed him a spoon filled with water - "Mia said to give you just a little. I can’t give much".  
He was thirsty and begged the girl for more.  
" No, - she strictly said, - we can do it in half an hour. Wait".  
A million questions were going through Jaime’s mind, and he never expected to get the answers right here and now.  
"We found you in a boat on the high seas not far from Tarth, my father had some business there, a girl chirping, we thought you were dead and you weren’t dead!"  
Her laughter rang like a bell, she told him something else Jaime thought: «Tart... How strange that the current took me to it...»  
Someone else came into the cabin, and the girl jumped out of the bed and ran towards her. An elderly woman, just as dark-skinned as the kid, very obese, hardly came to Jaime’s bed.  
"  
"He’s very thirsty, Maya, the girl was reporting, but I gave him to drink, as you said, just a little."  
" Good girl, - the old woman patted the kid on her curly head and turned to Jaime, - I see you’re better off, m'lord, I’ve healed your wounds in your sides, but you’ve lost a lot of blood and energy as you drifted off the sea. How did you end up alone and wounded man at sea?"  
"I don’t remember, - Jaime finally wheezing, - I think I escaped King’s Landing..."  
"Oh, - the old woman shook her head sadly, - They say it was the hell. You’re lucky you got out of there."  
"Where’s your ship going?" – Jaime asked.  
"We’re entering Pentos Harbor at the moment. Would you like to come ashore?"  
«Pentos. What game is fate playing with me? - It was Pentos where Jaime was supposed to sail with Cersei on Tyrion’s advice. - And here I am.»  
"Pentos is your end port?" - Jaime asked the woman.  
"We don’t have an end port, - she laughed. - My son’s ship sails all the way from Westeros to the free cities, from there to the Summer Islands and back to the North. We are free traders, transporting goods for the right price."  
"The smugglers?" - Jaime figured it out.  
The woman didn’t answer, but it was obvious.  
"If you need to go back to Westeros, you should get off in Pentos and look for the ship that follows in the opposite direction. Our path is to other seas."

Jaime went ashore. He went on his swinging legs to the nearest tavern to look for information about a ship heading for Westeros.  
There was a colorful group of sailors sitting at the next table, and they were having a noisy discussion about the news.  
"And I’m telling you, now the woman has become Lord Commander!" - claimed one of them.  
" 'No way, "- resented the other. The others cheered him with a loud laugh.  
"Don’t you believe it? Ask Crooked Milon, he just got back from King’s Landing. He saw this wench - as tall as your bell tower and blonde. Milon saw her."  
There was another burst of laughter at the table.  
"So, Milon is Crooked! Maybe he just imagined it?"  
The narrator was offended.  
"Milon may have only one eye, but he can see better than some others! Isn’t he the best sailing master around here?"  
The crowd was cheering. And the narrator continued:  
"Milon said he saw them all: the king on a wheelchair and his Hand, the dwarf Lannister, and the woman, the Lord Commander."  
Jaime sat with his back to the group but absorbed every word.  
«So, Tyrion again became the Hand, and Brienne is Lord Commander. She once dreamt of this.» The thought of Brienne filled his heart with warmth. But at the same time, he was in a great deal of pain: she was no longer waiting for him.  
Jaime felt exhausted and shattered, the memories of his previous life causing him pain.  
“I have no reason to return. I died for them all, - he thought - let it be.»

Jaime rose from the table and returned to the harbor. The ship which he arrived in was already preparing to sail.  
"Can I go with you?" - He asked the captain.  
He nodded.  
"If you really have nowhere to go, stay. We’ll find you a job."


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> «This page of my life is closed», - she ordered herself and accepted the offer. Naive! She thought that by going somewhere else, she could forget Jaime. But he chased her everywhere: she walked the same halls as he did, she settled in the same rooms where he once lived, and she slept in the same bed he once slept in. That realization came to her the first night she spent in the White Tower. She tried so hard to escape the memories of him that she found herself in a place with more of them. She cried all night long lying on this bed, cursing herself for being here and him - for not wanting to leave her.

Brienne hated this city with every fiber of her being. The stench haunted her everywhere: the smell of burning, rotting corpses, and overflowing fruit. She’s been living in this town for two weeks now, and constantly she’s been struggling with vomiting.  
Strange, when the last time she was here, a few years ago, it wasn’t the same. Although it was even hotter back then. Brienne attributed her health condition to the climate, nerves, and environment that was going on in the city after the fire, she waited for the day to pass, another and she would get used to it, but it got worse. Everything was soaked in this terrible smell: the walls of her chambers, her bed and her clothes. She couldn’t eat anything, every meal was tortured. The only thing that saved her was cold, sour water.  
When Tyrion Lannister, the Hand of the newly minted King, offered her the position of Lord Commander, she was pleased with it. She didn’t want to go back to the north, she couldn’t go back to the room where everything was soaked with memories of him, where she was so happy, even for a very short time.  
«This page of my life is closed», - she ordered herself and accepted the offer. Naive! She thought that by going somewhere else, she could forget Jaime. But he chased her everywhere: she walked the same halls as he did, she settled in the same rooms where he once lived, and she slept in the same bed he once slept in. That realization came to her the first night she spent in the White Tower. She tried so hard to escape the memories of him that she found herself in a place with more of them. She cried all night long lying on this bed, cursing herself for being here and him - for not wanting to leave her.  
The hardest part was when she opened the White Book. His chapter took up half a page. She read the record dozens of times and realized that she couldn’t start a new chapter without finishing the previous one. And it was she who should do it. She tried to do it several times, but every time, tears ran into her eyes, and she put it off for later.

Brienne stood by the window and watched the city awaken. The sun was only rising, but the day promised to be hot. Brienne sighed, she found it hard to wear armor, she was suffocating under her weight. It seemed that her powers had abandoned her. She put her pants on, and once again, she noticed that they were getting wide so, she pulled the strings tighter. I think I’m going to have to completely renovate my wardrobe.  
The door creaked and the handmaid came in, she put a tray on the table.  
“Good morning, my lady. I brought you breakfast.”  
She didn’t have to say it, the sharp smell of roast meat hit Brienne’s nose, and she felt the onset of nausea again. «Seventh hell! When will it stop?»  
“Take it away now. I won’t eat that,” - she told the maid.  
The girl took the tray and headed for the door, suddenly she turned around.  
“My lady, may I speak?”  
Brienne looked down at the girl surprised.  
“You don’t eat anything, you get sick all the time... I know it’s none of my business, but maybe you should see the maester?”  
The advice from the handmaid was a bit courageous but good. Brienne had already thought she needed some help, but she was hesitant to ask for it. She never asked anyone for help.

The small council meeting took place was began without the King as usual. He preferred to sit on his terrace, plunging himself into his inner world. The members of the council discussed the timing of the construction of ships, spending cuts and tax increases, and, without reaching any consensus, decided to drink some wine. Brienne could hardly wait for the council to end, and when everyone was headed out to the exit, she called the maester.  
“Grand Maester, can I have a favor to ask?” – it was difficult for her to find the proper words.  
Young Tarly was a charming, sympathetic fellow. It was easier to turn to such a man than to a pompous, narcissistic old man.  
“I don’t feel well, - Brienne continued, - I’m afraid I need your help.”  
The Maester readily nodded and offered her to proceed to his chambers.  
“Well, tell me - he started it - when they settled in the chairs in his office.”  
Brienne didn’t know where to start, but the young maester suddenly said all of her worries:  
“Are you not sleeping well? Are you feeling dizzy and sick?  
Brienne silently nodded, Tarly was satisfied he cleared his throat and continued.  
“And you have no appetite at all. You’re irritated sometimes and very often it makes you want to cry for no reason.”  
Brienne was stunned. Is he a psychic?  
Tarly was pleased with himself, he took Brienne by the hand, measured her pulse, it was obvious that he was a little excited. That scared Brienne. Did he know something?  
The next question was not simple for young maester.  
“I beg your pardon, m'lady, I mean, sir... but I have to ask. This is, of course, very personal... But I am a maester, I have the right to ask such questions, especially if the lady, I mean, sir...” - he seemed very confused.  
«Well, speak up!» - Brienne gave a mental order.  
“How long has it been since you’ve had your period?” - Finally the Maester articulate the question.  
Brienne was tense. This aspect of her life was constantly annoying, and she prayed to Seven that the phenomenon would disappear as soon as possible. She tried to remember the last time she had to deal with it. It was a long time ago, back in Winterfell, just before Jaime arrived. If it had been after, she would have remembered. It would have been a little inconvenient for them.  
“This was before the battle with the dead,” - Tarly is a bright young man, he remembers when it was.  
And slowly, very slowly, an idea began to develop in her head and it frightened her.  
“I have a friend, Sir, I mean, My Lady, Gilly. You probably know her,” - the Maester was trying to voice his suggestion to her, - “She was in Winterfell, too. She hid in the crypt with Lady Sansa and Lord Tyrion.”  
Brienne remembered a pretty girl with a little boy.  
“She, or rather, we will have a child soon, we hope, a girl,” - Tarly kept speaking, Brienne listened to him without understanding where he was going to, - “So at first she felt exactly the same as you do, sir. But then it went away.” - he finally finished on a happy note.  
Brienne kept looking attentively at him. What was that speech about? Tarly suddenly came up from the chair.  
“You know, I’m not very experienced, but I have an assistant. Why don’t I call her? She’s a great herbalist, and that’s all,” - he’s headed straight for the door, then he turns around.  
“I’ll be very quick, I promise. And while you are waiting you can have a snack,”  
\- he took a napkin off a small dish that smelled like cheese and smoked meat. Brienne felt nauseous again. He realized it and grabbed the dish and hid it in the cupboard. – “Sorry, my lady” – he put a pitcher on the table, - “Here is the water, just cold water, m'lady, excuse me, sir.”

And he ran down the stairs pretty fast, considering he was so fat.  
He did come back quite quickly, accompanied by an elderly woman. She looked up at Brienne and said only one thing:  
“Take your clothes off.”  
Tarly was embarrassed and left the room rushing into the furniture on his way.  
Brienne snatched her armor, breathing easier without it. The woman watched her silently. The armor was followed by a doublet. Brienne was in front of a woman in a shirt and pants only. The woman didn’t move.  
“Completely” – she told her.  
Brienne took off all her clothes and stayed naked like she was on her name day.  
The woman stepped a little further to look at Brienne as a whole. There was admiration in her eyes.  
“Has anyone ever told you you’re very beautiful?”  
Brienne’s face flashed. Only one person looked at her with the same admiration and said she was as beautiful as a goddess. One day, Jaime even joked that he had fallen in love with her at the exact moment she appeared to him naked and wet in Harenhall’s bathtub. A woman’s voice brought her back to reality, she laughed.  
“Yes, I see. Come here, girl.”  
Brienne approached the woman closer. She was much shorter, and her face was right on Brienne’s chest, but it seemed like that’s what the woman needed. She took her breasts into her hands as if weighing, then she squeezed them, Brienne gritted her teeth, it was hurt. The woman looked understandably at Brienne’s face and suddenly grabbed her nipple and squeezed hard, Brienne screamed.  
“What are you doing? It hurts!”  
“I see”, - the woman calmly replied. She stepped back again, looking at Brienne’s thighs this time.  
«Probably, this is how the women in the brothel feel, - Brienne had a thought, she realized that most likely this woman is the mistress of the brothel - but why is she looking at me?»  
A woman walked up to Brienne, leaned down and put her ear to her stomach. It was a sound of grumble in it.  
“Are you hungry?” - Surprised she asked.  
“I can’t eat,” - told Brienne, - “I’m constantly nauseous,” - she suddenly feels like a little girl complaining to her septa.  
The woman shook her head.  
“You can’t do that. You should eat well. Sit down,” - she pointed to a high chair.  
Brienne sat down, the woman leaned towards her face and staring into her eyes, stretching her eyelids, and she suddenly asked.  
“When was the last time you were with a man?”  
Brienne was outraged by it.  
“It doesn’t make any difference!”  
A woman laughed, - “I bet it wasn’t more than two months ago.”  
Actually, it’s only been a little over a month since their last night with Jaime. Brienne sighed. The woman kept on.  
“When was her last period?” - That’s the second time she’s been asked the same question. But the woman wasn’t in Winterfell, she’s not getting help with her clues.  
“More than two months.”  
The woman triumphantly smiled and spread her arms, as if to say: «Well, that appears to be that.»  
Brienne had already figured it out, but she couldn’t even pronounce it even in her head. The woman fondly put her hand on her shoulder:  
“Did you grow up without a mother?” – Drienne just nodded In return, - “you had no sisters, no girlfriends...”  
“How do you know?”  
“If it were, you’d know what’s going on with you. You’re pregnant, girl.”  
She said the word and knowing that it wasn’t a hunch, it wasn’t a theory, it was reality shocked Brienne. She never thought she could have children. Even when she was with Jaime, her dreams didn’t go beyond kissing and possessing each other. The gods gave her the greatest surprise, and she didn’t know what to do with it.  
The woman interpreted it in her own way.  
“Is this a surprise? If you want, I can help you get rid of the baby.”  
“No!” - Brienne screamed suddenly for herself and instinctively closed her stomach with her hands.  
Jaime. All the resentment and anger at him for leaving her went somewhere. He didn’t leave her at all. He’s going back to her, in their baby. She had a happy smile on her face.  
“I see the man who gave you this gift has taken a place not only in your womb but in your heart. Yes, girl? I hope he’ll be as happy as you are.”  
“No,” – Brienne gasped with sorry, - “he’ll never know about the baby. He’s dead.”  
The woman stroked her hand through Brienne’s hair.  
“It happens, girl, men break into our lives and then leave us heartbroken and with a bunch of snotty children. You’re lucky you only have one. Let me see.”  
She walked up to Brienne again, slapped her on the leg a little bit so that she could spread her knees, lean over, and suddenly put her fingers in the middle, where only one person in her life had access. Brienne angered loudly and hit a woman in the arm. But she calmly walked up to the window and looked closely at her fingers, she smelled them, Brienne didn’t like the look on her face.  
She turned to Brienne.  
“Do you want this child to live, girl?”  
Brienne nodded confidently.  
“Then take off your armor and leave the palace. Do you have any brothers? Or is your father still alive? “  
After receiving a positive answer, she kept going, “Go to her father, girl, and live there, quietly, far away from this hellhole. I hope he accepts you with the bastard. You can get dressed.”  
She started going through her bag, taking out some smelly sacks and mixing them in a little pot.

When Brienne was almost dressed, Tarly walked into the room embarrassed.  
“How is it, Auntie Mira?”  
A woman nodded to a young man.  
“Your guesses, Grand Maester, were correct. I’ll leave you some herbs she should drink to improve her condition. Have her drink the tea every hour. And make sure she eats something light - vegetable soup.”  
She said goodbye to the Grand Maester and headed out, then she turned around in the doorway and gave Brienne a hard look.  
“Take off your armor!”

Brienne tied her laces at her doublet and gratefully smiled to the young maester.  
“Thank you, Grand Maester, you’ve been very helpful.”  
Tarly seemed as happy as Brienne. He was confused a little and smiled in return. Brienne headed for the door.  
“Wait, m'lady,” - the voice of the Grand Maester was heard behind her back. He pointed out to her armor that continued to lie on the chair, - “You’ve forgotten...”  
Brienne just looked at it.  
“I’ll send for them.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> «Died defending his queen,» - She wrote the last line and put a point. In the memory of the people, Jaime Lannister will forever remain a worthy person, a true knight, a man of his word. As she knew him. She re-read the writing, gently, as if to say goodbye, stroke her hand on the page and closed the book.

Brienne has returned to her chambers. How could she not have guessed? Of course, she was very inexperienced in these matters, but still, she didn’t live in an isolated world, and she knew exactly what a man’s and a woman’s relationship could lead to, and she knew what it could mean to have no period, but she never projected it on herself.

She undressed and tried to see her body, alone. She turned sideways to the little mirror on the wall and stood on tiptoe to see her belly. She thought it was getting bigger. She caressed it gently.

“Jamie”, she said. Here in her chambers, she didn’t have to hide her feelings. She knew it would be a son. And she even knew what his name would be.

Aunt Mira’s decoction was very effective. The next day Brienne woke up rested, she had a good appetite. She waited for the handmaid to clean up after breakfast and prepared the table. 

Today she had a lot of work to do. She wrote a letter to her father, Lord Selwyn Tarth, telling him that she was coming home. The second case was much harder - to finish Jaime’s chapter in the White Book. In her mind she had already filled these pages several times, the text had long been formulated in her mind, it only had to be written on paper. 

She’d put on her armor she hates so much.  
«Only once, today, - she justified herself, - to finish all the business». She sat down at the table, opened the book, dipped the pen in ink, sighed and started writing. She thought it would be easier for her today, but the tears of treachery kept in her eyes.  
«Died defending his queen,» - She wrote the last line and put a point. In the memory of the people, Jaime Lannister will forever remain a worthy person, a true knight, a man of his word. As she knew him. She re-read the writing, gently, as if to say goodbye, stroke her hand on the page and closed the book.

She had only one more the most difficult task - to ask the King to resign.  
The resignation was written yesterday and Brienne had to wait for the small council meeting to address the king.

There was a knock on the door.  
“Come in,” - Brienne let in.  
Tyrion Lannister came in, the Hand of the King, he was holding something long, wrapped in cloth. He saw the book lying in front of Brienne, he knew what sort of book it was.  
“Are you writing a new chapter yet?” - He carelessly asked and put a parcel on the table.  
“No. I’m finishing the previous one”,- Brienne answered.  
Tyrion turned his eyes to the book.  
“Can I have a look?”  
Brienne pushed the book to the edge of the table. The Hand climbed up a chair too high for him. After finishing reading, he looked up at Brienne.  
“Thank you”, - he said it in a husky voice.  
“Someone had to do it.”  
“But I’m glad you did it.”  
Brienne wanted to tell him something but when she looked into his eyes she realized that words were unimportant, they shared the same pain of loss.

“I have a gift for you”,- he announced unexpectedly.  
Brienne smiled at her thoughts, she was already given gifts in this room. Tyrion unwrapped his parcel, there was a sword - the Widow’s Wail.  
“This is your brother’s sword”, - It was more of a statement than a question.  
“Yes, and now it’s yours. Jaime asked me to give it to you if he... wouldn't come back,”- Tyrion’s last words were pronounced with a heavy sigh.  
Brienne carefully took the sword in her hand. “So he’d remembered me in his last moments. A sword for a knight is an integral part of him. He wanted part of him to stay with me».  
Brienne swallowed a lump in her throat and spoke.  
“Thank you, My Lord. I swear, when the time comes, I will hand it to the proper hands.”

Tyrion nodded in silence. He bowed and was about to leave, but he didn’t.  
“Oh, one more thing, my lady. There will be no small council meeting today: the King is in-depth with his thoughts and I have no important questions for now. So, have a rest”, - he smiled and was going to head for the exit again, but he noticed that Brienne was upset about the news – “something’s wrong, m'lady? Are you upset about anything?”  
Brienne took a scroll from the table.  
“The thing is… I wanted to address the king today... with a petition.”

Tyrion was surprised.  
“Maybe I can help you? What is it?” - He reached out his hand and Brienne gave him the scroll. Maybe that’s better. It would be easier to explain everything to Tyrion than to the king.  
The Hand unwrapped the scroll and ran through it with his eyes.  
“Resignation? Are you serious? You’ve just taken office!” - He looked at Brienne, trying to understand her motives, - “you don’t like the city?” - He assumed, - “to be honest, I hate it too. Have you decided to return to Sansa’s service?”  
Brienne shook her head.  
“No. I’m going home to Tarth.”  
Those words really surprised Tyrion.  
“Your Lord Father is unwell and you want to see him?”  
“No”, - Brienne grinned. His attempts to guess the truth was amusing, - “my lord father is healthy and eagerly prepares for my return,” - Brienne understood that she had to explain the reason, - “my lord, I’d have to resign. If not now then in a couple of months. I can’t be in the Guard and pretty soon it’ll be obvious.”

She unwittingly put her hand on her stomach and smiled unconsciously.  
Tyrion looked at her with his eyes wide open. How could he not have guessed? He’s seen eyes that shine before and that look that’s dipped inside!  
“The coming years of my life,” - Brienne continued, - “I want to devote myself to raising my son.”  
She lovingly stroked Jaime’s sword. Tyrion realized whose worthy hands would one day have that sword.  
“It’s my brother’s child, isn’t it?” - Tyrion asked it rather break the silence. He didn’t even doubt it. Brienne and Jaime’s relationship developed before his eyes, and there was no doubt that it was true love. The realization that Jaime had left an heir made Tyrion extremely happy.  
“So the Lannisters aren’t over!” - The happy smile shines on his face.  
Brienne shook her head.  
“We weren’t wed with Jaime. My child will be illegitimate and...”  
But Tyrion happily interrupted her.  
“It doesn’t matter! I know who his father is.”  
Brienne has never seen the Hand so excited.  
“When are you leaving?” - He asked matter-of-factly.  
“Tomorrow afternoon a ship sails for Old Town. They’ve agreed to take me to Tarth. If the King allows...”  
“The King allows.” – Tyrion assured her and asked, - “let me escort you to the ship?  
Brienne nodded. Things were going very well. She was sure she would find support in Tyrion Lannister.

*****  
Brienne bid farewell to King’s Landing. She will never see this city again, the city which has taken away the man she loved.

Her belongings have already been boarded and taken to her cabin. She’ll be home in several days. And now she’s standing by the gangway waiting. Tyrion Lannister asked not to leave without saying goodbye. Soon she saw his little figure flashing between the tall and strong workers of the port.  
“Thank you for waiting, I’m glad you did. How do you feel?” - He asked her nicely.  
“Thank you, I’m fine,” - Brienne replied, - “the sea air and the anticipation of coming home give me strength.”  
“I think it will inspire you even more,” - he handed her a scroll.  
“What is it?”  
“A gift from the King. This is a document that confirms that the father of your child is Sir Jamie Lannister. You will write down the name by yourself.”  
“I’m not sure I’ll need it,” - Brienne was confused.  
Tyrion was very insistent.  
“Take it. You may not need it, but your child will. Don’t deprive him of what is rightfully his.”  
Brienne took the scroll and hid it on her chest.

“And another gift... “ - the Hand smiled.  
From behind the guards, Podrick Payne walked out smiling, holding a bag of his belongings.  
“Podrick?” - Brienne realized what kind of gift he’s talking about. These Lannisters are constantly pushing her on this guy. – “No!” - she cut it off categorically.  
“Yes!” - Tyrion firmly replied. –“ Lady Brienne,” – he went on in a softer and friendlier tone, - “there are plenty of decent men willing to serve in the Kingsguard, but Podrick is only one, I want you to have a reliable man and a good friend by your side.”  
“My Lady, - her former squire addressed her. – “I have served you for half my life and I want to continue serving.”  
She couldn’t resist that charming smile. Podrick realized his lady had softened, he offered Brienne a hand to help her to board the ship.  
“Lady Brienne,” - Tyrion took her hand, leaned over and kissed it. – “May I ask your permission to visit you on Tarth?”  
“Lord Lannister, you will always be welcome in my home”, - Brienne smiled and set foot on the gangway.  
Tyrion held Podrick for a second.  
“Take care of her.”  
The squire gave an understanding nod.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brienne was finally able to relax, she did nothing but sleep, eat and sit on the beach for hours. She didn’t realize she needed a break. She was accustomed to living in motion, surrounded by a lot of people who weren’t always honest and friendly; she was accustomed to being constantly tense and with that, her nerves were like a stretched string. Jaime’s death was the final blow to her life, and she knew that if it wasn’t for the baby, she would surely go crazy. The relaxed atmosphere of Tarth, the gentle care of the servants and the unreserved support of her father did the job - she felt the desire to live.

Chapter 4

Lord Selwyn Tarth was delighted that his rebellious daughter had finally returned home. He had not seen her for ages and had received little news. One of the few was a demand from a gang of outlaws to buy Brienne out for a sack of sapphires equal to her weight. The old lord was desperate, he did not think that anyone took the name of the island seriously and proposed 300 golden dragons, but this response did not satisfy the blackmailers. How his stupid daughter got out of that mess and what saved her, he never knew. But it didn’t matter now because she was home and she didn’t seem to be going anywhere else.

Brienne was finally able to relax, she did nothing but sleep, eat and sit on the beach for hours. She didn’t realize she needed a break. She was accustomed to living in motion, surrounded by a lot of people who weren’t always honest and friendly; she was accustomed to being constantly tense and with that, her nerves were like a stretched string. Jaime’s death was the final blow to her life, and she knew that if it wasn’t for the baby, she would surely go crazy. The relaxed atmosphere of Tarth, the gentle care of the servants and the unreserved support of her father did the job - she felt the desire to live.

The only thing she was worried about was that a couple of months would pass and her secret would be revealed. How would her father react? Would he turn his back on her? Won’t she have to find another place to live? Can she raise a child herself?

Before leaving the capital, Brienne met Auntie Mira again and asked her in detail what was happening to her and what was to come. By the way, Brienne was right about the woman serving in a brothel, and one of her jobs was to notice the first signs of pregnancy. She helped women dispose of unwanted children, treated them and helped to deliver babies. Brienne examined herself every night, she knew she still had time, but sometimes she thought if there’s a woman in her life who’s as good as Auntie Mira? She decided not to have a handmaid and wouldn’t let anyone help her wash or change her clothes.

*****  
Her life ran slowly and carelessly until her father decided that he should take his daughter’s fate into his own hands.

He invited her to his terrace, where he liked to spend his afternoons watching the sunset.

“Sit down”, he brought her a wicker chair himself, offering to sit next to him. He was watching the sunset for a while, giving Brienne time to focus on the conversation. – “Daughter, I don’t know what kind of adventures and upheavals you’ve been through on your travels. I can only imagine that you’ve had a difficult time. When you came back, I’m sorry, but I couldn't bear to look at you - exhausted, pale, skinny.”

Brienne grinned, she really looked like a dying girl back then.

Her father continued.

“The house where you grew up, the air of your native land, the care of your loved ones cured you, didn’t they? Your eyes are shining again, your cheeks are blushing, you’re smiling more often... and everyone agrees with me if I say you’re very pretty.”

Brienne was initially sedated by her father’s gentle voice, tense. Where does it lead?

“I take it you’ve had quite enough of your adventures and decided to settle down?” – He perceived her silence as a sign of consent and went on. – “I am an old man, my daughter, and soon my time will come. You will be Evenstar.”

Brienne tried to argue with him, to tell him he was still healthy and strong enough, but he wouldn’t listen to her.

“But can a woman rule the island on her own? Without a husband?”  
Brienne did not expect such a twist in the conversation, she opened and closed her mouth helplessly, trying to get into the old lord’s monologue.

“The island needs a man’s hand. A man’s mind is important in managing the castle and the land/ I know you’re gonna say you’re strong enough and smart enough, and I don’t mind, but you’re gonna have a hard time coping with this burden on your own. You’re able to make the right decisions, I’m sure, but it’s a man who has to order. You know what I mean?” - he leaned toward his daughter, - “you should get married.”

Those words are out of the blue.

“Father, no,” - Brienne objected.

“Yes!” –Her father responded categorically, – “Let’s forget your foolish childish whims that you will marry only the one who defeats you in battle. I’m not blind, and I understand that you are a strong fighter, and no men equal in your strength around. But think of the future. You’re a mature woman, at your age, your mother already had two children. Who will inherit the castle if you don’t get married now?”

Brienne listened intensely to the end of the monologue. Poor father, he’s absolutely right, from his point of view. He certainly loves her, cares about her honor, cares about her future. What a blow to him will be her confession. That’s not how she imagined them talking. But I have to tell him now, or it’ll be too late.

“Father”, - she took his hand, offering to sit down. It’s better to listen to the news sitting down, - “I understand you care about me and my future as much as you can But in my life, it’s much more complicated. I’m not getting married, father. And it’s not because I don’t have an equal fighter on the island. My heart is already occupied, it belongs to one man, and it will never belong to anyone else.”

Lord Selwyn was annoyed.

“So why isn’t this man asking for your hand? Or is he engaged?” - He gave a suspicious look at his daughter.  
“He’s died, father”, - Brienne said with a lump in her throat.  
The old lord took a heavy breath and took his daughter’s hand.  
“I understand you, sweetling. Once upon a time, my heart was torn by grief when your mother was gone.”  
“But you didn’t remarry,” - Brienne reminds him.  
“Yes,” - the Lord agreed, - “but this is different. I am a man, and I already had heirs.”  
“My story is also different,” - she bravely looked at her father’s face. It’s time to say? – “ no one, you’d asked to marry me, would have done that.”  
The old Lord’s face stretched out with wonder. Why won’t any of his men marry his heir?  
“I’m pregnant, father”, - Brienne exhaled.

She was expecting a surge of emotion, menacing accusations, and curses, but her father continued to sit silently in his chair and found no words. Brienne thought it was a good sign, so he’s ready to listen to it. She moved closer to him, continued to hold his hand, and spoke as gently as possible.

“Father, I never thought that the gods would bless me with such happiness. I loved and was loved. The time I spent with that man was the happiest time of my life. We were engaged, father,” - a little lie. But didn’t the ceremony when Jaime knighted her become their actual betrothal? – “When he died, I thought I was going to die, too. That babe has saved me. It’s the only thing that kept me going. I’m prepared to thank the gods every day for not turning their back on me and giving me this gift.” - She looked her father straight in the eye, - “Father, please don’t judge me. Help me raise my son,” - she thought she’d learned to deal with her pain, but the tears were treacherous out of her eyes.

Her father stood up in silence and walked several times around the terrace.

Brienne did not doubt that her father would take her side, but she was afraid of spooking her luck, so she couldn’t breathe to watch him fight his prejudices. He stopped abruptly and turned to his daughter and voiced one of his doubts.

“But what will people say, Brienne?” - He was confused. – “The daughter of a high-born lord gave birth to a bastard!”  
“Father,” - Brienne came up to him and put her head on his shoulder, as she did when she was a child? – “What is more important to you: the words of some strangers, foolish gossips, or the peace and happiness of your daughter?”

Lord Selwyn had no choice but to hug his foolish, wayward, but beloved girl.  
“You’ll have a grandson, father.”  
“Yes, my little girl,” - the old Lord cradled his grown-up little girl, - “we’ll raise him to be a good man.”  
“I’m not ready to die yet,” - Lord Tarth thought, - “still so much work.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The old lord flinched like he’d been shot.  
> “Don’t even start saying anything bad about my son’s father”, - Brienna said strictly, - “he was a very good man. No one knew him as I did. He was a man of honour, a true knight, and a loyal friend. If Jaime is like him, I’m gonna think I’ve lived my life for a reason.”

The boy was born in time, strong and healthy.

Lord Selwyn came to see his daughter in her chambers. She was lying on the bed, the baby by her breasts.

“In noble families, it is customary to take a wet nurse for children”, - the Lord cautiously suggested to his daughter.  
Brienne shook her head.  
“I’ll feed my son myself. I was told that babies grow up especially strong when they are fed by their own mothers”.

The Lord sighed. He was used to his daughter doing what she thought was best, without regard for tradition or reputation. He looked at Brienne and admired her, he never saw her so calm and peaceful. He decided he could ask.

“Daughter, can I find out at last who the father of my grandson is? Can I hear the name?”  
Brienne hesitated to answer. She remembered how everyone around her, and she herself, had once crooked contemptuously when she heard his name. «The Kingslayer» has surfaced in her memory. There was a time when she addressed him only this way. She was afraid of the reaction of her father. How would he feel about a boy knowing whose son he is? Well, it’s not the first time she’s protected her lover. She looked up and looked right in Lord Selwyn’s face.

“Jaime Lannister.”

The old lord flinched like he’d been shot.  
“Don’t even start saying anything bad about my son’s father”, - Brienna said strictly, - “he was a very good man. No one knew him as I did. He was a man of honour, a true knight, and a loyal friend. If Jaime is like him, I’m gonna think I’ve lived my life for a reason.”

Lord Selwyn was shocked, he could only ask.  
“You named the boy Jaime?”  
“Yes,” - Brienne was very firmly. – “He deserved it.”  
«Who does she mean?" - the old lord was confused, - “dead Lannister or his son? What difference does it make?»  
He looked at his grandson and mentally asked the gods that the boy inherit their family traits.

*****  
Lord Selwyn’s hopes were not to be fulfilled. The older Brienne’s son became, the more obvious his origin was seen. The grandfather looked attentively at his grandson and regretted that both the colour of his hair and his eyes, the features of his face, and even the walk, all in him shouted that he was a Lannister.

Lord saw Jaime Lannister only once at a tournament dedicated to the name day of Prince Rhaegar Targaryen. The young squire did not leave Barristan Selmy’s side, was smart and slick. Lord Tarth had just lost his own son - he drowned in the sea. The Lannister boy was his age, and Selwyn was distressed to think that his son might have been in his place. The image of the young Jaime was now often in the memory of the old Lord, and he admitted that his grandson was a complete reincarnation.

Brienne didn’t limit her son to anything. He grew up completely free, he was often seen with the swag of country boys, barefoot, dirty and bruised. He swam like a fish, climbed the rocks with the boys, picking up seagulls eggs and baking them on a bonfire. Everyone around here loved the kid for being kind and cheerful and having a sharp tongue. It never occurred to anyone to call him a bastard, everyone knew he was the future lord of Tarth.

Brienne, on the one hand, was happy that her son was growing up to be a happy child, free and loved. She admired his kindness, agility and courage. His jokes made her laugh though sometimes she was puzzled.  
She wondered and at the same time was pleased with how her son looked like her lover. But sometimes it frightened her: the boy was proud and capricious, sometimes stubborn and arrogant. This made his father’s life very difficult, and Brienne wanted her son’s life to be easier.

Grandfather tried to teach the boy, but after learning to read, write and add simple numbers, he said that the knight no longer needed to know anything else, and abandoned the books. His favourite lessons were sword playing and riding. He was very good at that. Sometimes he armed his friends with wooden sticks and held tournaments in the courtyard.  
Ser Podrick became his mentor, his work was not great: waking the boy and taking him to the library for lessons, after lunch he taught him sword playing and riding, telling stories about the great houses of Westeros.

The old Lord insisted that the heir to the lands should not be raised ignorant and continued his efforts to train his grandson. He once locked him in a library, ordered him to read until lunch, but Jaime ran out the window and spent the day at the beach. He came back in the evening, dirty and tired. Brienne met him in the courtyard.  
“Jaime, you’ve upset your Lord Grandad once again”, - she said.

The boy frowned.  
“Mother, why does he make me read these stupid books? When I try to put letters into words, I think my brain will explode. You want a son with no brains?”  
Brienne laughed.  
“No, I want my son with a healthy brain. But I don’t want my son to be stupid.’ - She took Jaime by the hand, and they went to his chambers.

She ordered the handmaid to bring water for washing. The boy started undressing, and she wanted to help him with all the strings and buckles, but she didn’t dare. When he was five years old, she told her son that he would do everything by himself. «He is on a tough road”, - Brienne thought, - “ and he should be ready for everything in this life». At first, it was difficult, but later the boy got settled and became completely independent. Brienne watched her son wash, a stream of water flowing down his thin back, and a similar image came to her mind: her room in Winterfell and Jaime washed over a washbasin, and water flowing down his back. «How alike they are», - she was surprised once again. Of course, her son was still a child, short and thin as a blade, but pretty soon, he’ll be stretched out, muscled out, and a real man. She smiled at that thought. Someday that time will come but now he’s just her little son. She went up to him and hugged him tightly, kissing the top of his head, it smelled of sea, smoke and honey. The boy began to burst out of her arms.

“Mother, you treat me like a baby.”  
“And you’re really the baby,” - Brienne laughed, - “only little babes don’t realize that study is very important. Grown, smart men don’t run out from lessons through the window. You want to prove you’re big?” - She looked at Jaime.

He felt a catch, but he couldn’t figure out what it was. He agreed to it just in case.  
“Can we agree that you will read and do sums every day? You see, the human brain needs training, as does the body. If you want your body to be strong and agile, you practice every day, don’t you?” - The boy nodded, Brienne kept looking him right in the eye – “if you didn’t train your brain, it would go soft and turn into tripe. You want to live with the tripe in your head?”

The kid’s eyes expanded with horror.  
“No.”  
“Then you’ll read ten pages every day after breakfast...”  
“Ten pages!” - The boy was panicking, - “mother, please...”  
Brienne could barely keep her from laughing. She took pity on the little lazybones.  
“Well, five pages and retell what you read to me, Grandpa, or Ser Podrick. And if we see your zeal, if you don’t let me down during a month, I...” - Brienne’s been pulling the wool. To be honest, she hasn’t figured out a way to reward her son yet, but all of a sudden, she sees his wooden sword, - “and I’ll let you practice with an iron sword.”  
Jamie threw himself on Brienne’s chest happily, and he even didn’t think that hugging his mother was for the little ones. He was pouring kisses into her face.  
“Thank you, Mother! I promise I’ll read every day!”

Brienne gave her boy another big hug.  
“Then good night, my little lion,” - she whispered in his ear their secret phrase which she said to him every night before bed, - “tomorrow your first day of the challenge.”  
She left his room, enjoying how easily they had agreed. «I should have insisted on ten pages», she thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My dear readers, today's my birthday ))) So, I've decided to dedicate the chapter when little Jaime Lannister is born to this occasion )) So, we have birthdays on the same day )) Isn't it fantastic? ;)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime grabbed the kid by the shoulders and turned to himself. Gods! How did he not see? Green eyes, golden hair, eyebrow line, nose, mouth... Jaime had a full copy of himself in front of him.

“Tarth, M'Lord”, - the sailing master announced.

Jaime already knew they were approaching the island. The water overboard was an incredible blue color. He didn’t know whether it was the reflection of the cloudless blue sky, or whether it was a peculiarity of the sea vegetation off the coast of Tarth, but the name of Saphire Island was absolutely justified.

Jaime was on Tarth for the first time. He’s heard so much, thought so much about it, tried to get there several times, but some evil fate kept taking him aside.

Jaime held the wheel firmly with his left hand and elbow to his right. During these ten years he traveled by sea, he mastered many professions: first as a simple errand boy to old Mia’s, captain’s mother, then he was promoted to a seaman, and he did almost the same work, but he was already being instructions not only by the old woman but the captain as well. And now he’s been helmsman for five years. He’s got a great handle on the steering wheel. From a constant stay in the wind and the sun, his skin turned dark and rough, and his hair sun-stricken. He had wrinkles around his eyes because he was constantly squinting. And now very hardly anyone would recognize the old golden lion - Jaime Lannister.

During his travellings, he never went ashore in any port in Westeros. His captain’s contraband business brought them to different cities: White Harbor, Sun Spear, Lannisport, and even a couple of times to King’s Landing, but as the ship approached the port, Jaime would leave for his cabin and sit there until the ship left. He was afraid to see familiar streets, and especially to meet familiar faces.

But today he decided to change his principles and go ashore.

With the death of his heart, he set foot in the sand. He was never here, and hardly anyone could recognize him. While the captain was meeting with his business partners, Jaime walked the beach, taking deep breaths of the air of this place so close to him. This is her homeland, the place where she grew up, this is the port from which she once sailed secretly from her father in search of adventure. “Brienne.” The image of a tall, blue-eyed blonde in armor with a sword in her hand hasn’t left it all these years. He wondered if she ever visited her father.

Jaime sat down on a big, sun-heated rock. Nearby, local boys jumped into the water from a steep cliff. He looked at the boys, when he was a kid, he used to dive from Casterly Rock the same way. He thought, “Was this all about me? No. This is Jaime Lannister jumping off a cliff. And I’m not him.”

When old Mia, who saved his life ten years ago, asked his name, the first thing he remembered was a Stark boy he threw out a window. And he said his name was Bran.

So, from that day he was Bran, and Jaime Lannister remained buried under the ruins of the Red Keep.

He looked at the boys again. One of them is probably the youngest, because the smallest in height, but plain and thin as a Valyrian blade, came into the water beautifully.  
«Well done», - thought Jaime.  
He heard the rustling of the sand - his captain approached him. Jaime stood up. “It is probably time to get back on board”, - he thought and then he heard:  
“Jaime! Jaime!”

He flinched. “Who could recognize him?”  
He turned to the scream - the boys were running all over the beach, two of them jumped into the water, looking for someone. Jaime was dead - he couldn’t see that little one.  
The captain touched his shoulder.

“Let’s go. Damn place”, - he swore, - “they told me that Kitton was a cheapskate. I should have listened to smart people. We came here for nothing.”  
Jaime was looking in the water and waiting for the boy to show up on the surface.  
“Hey, can you hear me?” – the captain’s mad, - “we’re leaving.”  
Jaime turned to him.  
“The boy... he’s dived and isn’t coming out...”  
“What’s in it for you? Let his father concern about it!” - he saw Jaime taking his swordbelt and boots off in a hurry. – “What are you doing? If you don’t get back to the ship right now, we’ll sail without you.”

But Jaime didn’t hear him anymore, he was running to the water.

During his ten years at sea, he developed his skills as a swimmer and learned to dive deep and stay underwater for a long time. At two long strokes, he was already under a rock, dived deeply, and began to look deep - the boy was there, his body went gently to the bottom, his eyes were closed. Jaime grabbed him with his right hand and held him tightly against his side, good thing the boy is small and thin. He wouldn’t have pulled out a grown man. He pushed away from the bottom and, rowing with only one left hand, started to rise. It seemed to him that it had been an hour before he came up to the surface. The place was very deep. He didn’t think they would have found the boy’s body if Jaime hadn’t gotten him out. With great difficulty, he dragged the boy to the shore and threw him on the sand. The boy’s friends surrounded them.

“Is he alive?” - carefully asked one of them.  
Jaime only looked at them angrily. Why did they let him jump in this wash? He looked at the boy: golden hair covered his pale face, lips turned blue.  
“No, mate”, - angrily said Jaime, - “I won’t let you go so easily”. He saw the drowned men being rescued more than once, he turned the boy and put his chest on his knee and pressed it hard, again, again... The boys silently watched the procedure with horror.

“We have to call for help,” - one of them assumed. Everyone rushed off and ran up the path.

Jaime thought that the help that the boy’s friends were after was unlikely to be forthcoming. This kid’s life is in his hands now. He swore and hit the boy on the back with new force. The water came out of his mouth, and he made up a cough that went into vomit. Jaime breathed lightly but continued to pat the boy on the back. When all the water came out, he allowed him to lie on his back. The boy breathed heavily and stared at his saviour.

“I drowned, didn’t I?”  
“No”, - Jaime grinned, - “not today”, - he said a famous Braavosi phrase.  
The boy sat down and looked away in silence. He was shaking.  
“Did you get cold?” – Jaime asked. But the boy was quiet and just banging his teeth out loud.  
“This horror comes out”, - Jaime realized, - “he would have been warmed and given something sedative.”  
He couldn’t soothe the little kids, and he was very confused. Maybe could he distract him by talking?

“You’re a local?” – it was the first thing he thought of.  
The boy nodded, then looked at him.  
“And you are not.”  
“Right, “ - Jaime nodded, - “I was on that ship”, - he pointed out to the ship that was leaving the harbour.  
“Did you miss your ship when you rescued me?” - The boy’s eyes were rounded up.

“Actually, I’m not too upset”, - “Jaime suddenly realized that he was really excited about not being on the boat”, - “I wanted to visit your beautiful island so long. Do you think I’d like that?”  
The boy smiled and nodded. He stopped shaking, apparently, the conversation really distracted him. And then Jaime remembered what caught his eye when the kid was drowning.

“Your name is Jaime? I heard your friends call you.”  
“Yeah,” - the boy answered.  
Jaime has never met a namesake in his life, except for some distant relative.  
“A rare name’, - he noticed, - “who called you that?”  
“My mother.”  
“Why not the father? It’s customary in Westeros for a father to name his son. Is it different on Tarth?”  
“I don’t know my father.” - The boy sighed, - “he died in King’s Landing before I was born.”  
“Who did he fight for?” – Jaime asked. He really couldn’t figure out who the man from Tarth was fighting for. Storm’s End was not part of this battle.  
“He defended the city’, - the boy spoke proudly.  
“So, for the Lannisters,” – Jaime thought, - “what a twist of fate: now a Lannister saved the life of the son of this unknown hero.»

“Your friends took their time”, - Jaime joked, - “they said they were going to get help.”  
“It’s a long way to the castle’, - the boy calmly explained,” – “ I’d rather go myself.”  
He found his clothes and boots and dressed quickly.  
Jaime thought: “He is too self-sufficient for his age.”  
“How old are you, Jaime?”  
“Ten.”

From above the juniper bush, they heard a call:  
“Jaime!” - The voice sounded suspiciously familiar.  
“Are they looking for you?”  
“Yes, this is Ser Podrick. Apparently, the boys told him what happened.”

Jaime’s heart stopped beating.  
“Podrick?”  
“Yes, he’s my mentor.”  
Jaime took his breath away.

‘Do you live in a castle?”  
“Yeah”, - the boy was buttoning up his vest and not paying attention to the suddenly changed face of his saviour.

Jaime’s brain was full of work: “What can this boy be if he lives in a castle and Podrick is his mentor?”  
And the kid, as he’d heard, kept answering his question.

“My mother is Lady Tarth.”

And then Jaime completely forgot how to breathe. The boy is Brienne’s son! Who else could Lady Tarth be? Whom can Podrick serve to? So, she got married? Although, no. The boy said his father died defending King’s Landing!»

Jaime grabbed the kid by the shoulders and turned to himself. Gods! How did he not see? Green eyes, golden hair, eyebrow line, nose, mouth... Jaime had a full copy of himself in front of him.

Podrick’s voice came very close  
“Jaime, are you here?”  
“I have to go’, - the boy said tensely, he was alerted by the sudden change of mood of his saviour.

Jaime let go of his hands, he realized he was scaring the boy.  
“Go,’ - he nodded.  
The boy took several steps up the path and turned around.  
“Thank you, my lord, for saving me.”

Jaime continued to stand there gaping in silence.

When the boy disappeared into the bush, he fell to the sand and cried.  
What did he do? Ten years! For ten years he sailed around the world, not knowing he had a son growing up. All those years, Brienne lived here alone. She thought he was dead and raised their son alone. Why didn’t he come back?

By the time Jaime calmed down, the sun had already rolled across the sea.  
“I will fix everything “, - he swore, - “I was brought to this island for a reason. I stayed here for a reason. I will return to them.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas, my dear readers!  
> I've decided to give a present for all of you and update this chapter this very day. The chapter in which Jaime meets his son and when the real dinamics begin.   
> Hope you've enjoyed it. 😊


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime took a bitter breath.
> 
> “I’ve been away for too long. I didn’t know much about what I should know.”
> 
> “What exactly?” - The kid looked Jaime in the eye.
> 
> “What exactly? – Jaime answered mentally, - “that I am your father, my boy.”

*****  
His first impulse was to rush into the castle, fall at Brienne’s feet and beg for forgiveness. But will she forgive? Jaime imagined her face - strict, restrained; the biggest sin for her was a betrayal. And he in her eyes was a traitor. But he knew how to find the way to her heart - their son must unite them. He will gain the love and respect of his son, and she will understand that he is worthy of her forgiveness.

Jaime settled in a small inn near the beach where he first met his son. He spent the morning in the mess hall, discreetly interrogating the staff about Lady Tarth and her family. As he suspected, she quickly left her post in the King’s Guard and returned to her homeland almost a month after the fall of King’s Landing.

“If I had boarded a ship to Westeros in Pentos, we would have arrived here at the same time” - Jaime thought with regret, - «I wonder how her father took the news?”  
“I’m sorry”, - he approached the owner of the inn, who was apparently a chatty woman, and now was willingly sharing information, - “when I left these lands, Lord Selwyn ruled here.”  
“Yes, he was a decent landlord, everyone here respected him and felt sorry for him. The gods sent him four children, and only one daughter survived. And she was a wayward girl.”  
Jaime didn’t want to hear bad words about Brienne, so he interrupted a woman.

“So, what’s going on with Lord Selwyn?”  
“That’s what I’m talking about, m'lord, listen!” - A stubborn host led her line – “the girl got completely out of hand – went knighting!” - Jaime smiled a little. He heard the story from the heroine of the story. The lady took his smile in her own way. “It’s funny, isn’t it? But it was the old man’s fault, he had to raise the girl right, and he taught her, you see, to swing a sword! Where has it been seen? Anyway, she’s been walking around the world for years, and you know? She’s become a knight! Even served in the Guard of the current king! See?” - She said it so joyfully that Jaime thought she was proud of her glorious countrywoman, - “but nature takes its toll, m'lord’, - she lowered her voice, - “ten years ago Lady Brienne returned under her father’s roof, with a baby in her belly. Whether you are a queen, or a servant, or a knight, you are still just a woman who wants to love and bear children.”

This simple truth, though expressed so rudely, struck Jaime. He knew both the queens and the female knight, and he knew full well that under both the dresses and the heavy armour there were gentle, touching girls who could love with all their heart.

“And Lord Selwyn,’ - Jaime carefully continued to question, - “was he very angry that his daughter had given birth...” - he could not pronounce the word. He was horrified: “I cannot allow my son to be a bastard.» He remembered the contemptuous shuffling behind his back, calling his and the Cersei’s children in such a way. ”Now everything is different,” - he thought, -“ I will marry Brienne and recognize the son». 

He continued.  
“The Lord… was he very angry that her daughter had given birth without being married?”

“I don’t know, don’t know’, - a woman confessed, - “but there was definitely no scandal. I think they settled it peacefully. What’s done is done. You can’t put a baby back into its mother, can you, m'lord?” - She laughed at her own joke.

And here Jaime agreed with her: “How much practical wisdom this simple woman has. Sometimes it is so missing by the high-born ladies.’  
And the woman kept going, it was nice for her to talk while the mess hall was empty. By the way, the listener was grateful, attentive, and generous.  
“Moreover the Lord’s daughter was his only heiress. If he had four of them, he might have sent her away with a child but he left them here.”  
Jaime praised the gods that Brienne was her father’s only child. Where would she go alone with the babe?

“And she has a nice boy”, - the woman continued. Jaime was totally in agreement, - “not spoiled like the other lords’ kids. I’ve seen them like this - their noses are turned off by the smallfolk and they talk through their teeth. But this one is not like they, he’s nice, not greedy, everyone here loves him. You could see him by yourself, he often swims with the boys over there”, - she pointed to a cliff.

Jaime followed her hand.

“Isn’t it dangerous to dive there?”  
“What’s the danger to the boys? They’re just encouraging them, aren’t they, m'lord?” - The host winked at Jaime.  
“Yes, perhaps’,- he replied, - “Lord Selwyn still rules the island, doesn’t he?”

The woman breathed a sigh.  
“No, he died a few months ago. Went quietly in his sleep. Now his daughter is our landlady.”  
“Poor Brienne, - thought Jaime, - lost her only support.”  
He thanked the host generously and went outside.

Children’s voices were heard from the side of the cliff. “Mischievous little creatures”, - Jaime thought, - “they again put their lives in danger”. He’s headed towards the beach.  
The boys were really there. They were climbing up a high cliff like ants and splashing off into the water, but his son wasn’t one of them. He was sitting apart by the foot of the cliff, dressed.  
Jaime breathed lightly, walked up, and sat on the rock nearby.

“You’re not diving today?” - He asked.  
The boy turned around. Bright green eyes, thin nose with broad nasal bridge, straight golden hair constantly fall on eyes... “My boy”, Jaime thought. None of his children was as much like him as this one. He was so desperate to hold the boy tightly until he lost his breath. “You cannot,” - he ordered himself, - “you will only scare him away, and you should put him to himself. Patience”.

The boy sighed back.

“My mother forbade me from diving off a cliff.”  
“The boy does not like restrictions”, - Jaime thought. It was familiar to him.

“Women… “ – he said thoughtfully? – “sometimes they demand obedience from us. But if you really respect and love a woman, why not give in? Especially if she has a reason to ask for it. Does your mother have a reason?”

“Yeah. She says my life doesn’t belong to me alone. I have to think about the people I care about. How they’ll feel without me.”  
“Wise,” – Jaime agreed. – “And sometimes we have to sacrifice more than our pride and ego for them...”

The boy looked at Jaime’s right arm.  
“You sacrificed your hand for a woman, didn’t you?”  
“Yes”, - he answered looking at his stump. Long ago there was a golden hand on this spot, but it remained under the rocks in the dungeons of the Red Keep, - “and I do not regret it. Everything we do is for love. Isn’t that right, my friend?” - Jaime winked at his son.

The boy looked at his father with admiration.

“Tell me how it happened!”  
Jaime wasn’t ready for that. He suspected that Brienne had told her son something about her adventures, and feared that the coincidences in their stories would lead to premature suspicions. That’s why he didn’t tell much.

“My lady was in very serious danger, I had to protect her. Well… and I lost my hand.” - Jaime shrugged like it was a normal situation.  
“So, did you save her?” - The boy was excited.  
“Of course I did’, - Jaime answered confidently, - “if I hadn’t been able to save her, I would have died with her.”

The boy was thinking.  
“Are you a knight?”  
The question put Jaime at a dead end.  
“Yes. I was once.”  
Now it’s time to surprise the boy.  
“Are there any ex-knights?”

Jaime was thinking about it. He was knighted when he was sixteen, but was he a knight when he threw the Stark boy out of the tower window or when he attacked Ned Stark with a detachment of armed men in King’s Landing? Was he a knight when he killed his cousin to escape the Northmen? No, he wasn’t. But Brienne was a real knight years before he knighted her. As Catelyn Stark said, “She’s the truer knight than you’ll ever be”? But he'd became him, at least, Jaime hoped that under the influence of Brienne, he came close to what is called “a man of honour, a true knight.” And has he stopped being one because everyone thinks he’s dead?

“I suppose you’re right, my friend”, - he agreed with his son, - “if a man chose a knight’s path, he must follow it to the end.”  
“My mother is also a knight,” - the boy reported proudly.

Jaime pretended to be surprised.  
“She is the first and only female knight in all six kingdoms! By the way, she served in the Kingsguard, was Lord Commander! Didn’t you know?”

Jaime took a bitter breath.

“I’ve been away for too long. I didn’t know much about what I should know.”

“What exactly?” - The kid looked Jaime in the eye.

“What exactly? – Jaime answered mentally, - “that I am your father, my boy.”

Instead of responding, Jaime took a heavy breath, turned his gaze to the sea, and covered his face with his hand.

So they sat in silence for a few minutes. Then the kid got up.

“I have to go home,” - he waved the boys on the rock and they started getting ready. The son looked at his father carefully, - “you’re weird, you know?”

This remark puzzled Jaime.  
“It’s like you want to say something, but then you change your mind.”  
“You see” - Jaime tried to explain, - “there are words that take a certain amount of time. If you say them too soon or too late, you can ruin everything.”

The boy nodded comprehensibly.  
“Will I see you again?”  
“I think so,“ - Jaime grinned, - “I’ve decided to stay here forever.”  
He watched his son and the boys climb up the path, as they chatted and laughed together, and then all of a sudden, everyone rushed forward, apparently, someone gave the order to run in a race. He thought about what a wise woman Brienne was: when their son grew up, those boys would follow him, not because he was their lord, but because he was their friend.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boy took a heavy breath.
> 
> “I wish I had brothers and sisters.”
> 
> Such a remark very amused Jaime, he smiled and thought. “Well, well, I will take care to fix it”.

Jaime spent several days settling down, he had to find a job. The innkeeper helped him, her father kept an antique shop and a pawnshop in the harbour, he was old and sublime, so he needed help. Jaime was well versed in jewellery and antiques, so his new master was pleased with him. The wasn’t much work, he had to be in the shop when the big ships came to the port, their passengers sometimes brought interesting specimens from the travels, they had to be valued and paid. Jaime was often busy only until lunch, and in the afternoons he usually walked around, exploring the area. 

“If I decided to stay here forever, I must know the area that will become my home’, - he reasoned.

Once he even went to the castle where Lady Tarth lived. The castle was high above the sea, the rock was so steep, and the waves were so furious against it that only a madman could attempt to swim there. Now it was clear why the boys were running closer to the harbour, where the sea was more peaceful. Storm End, what to say? There was only one road to the castle and it was completely open, Jaime did not dare to step on it, anyone who did that was seen from the castle a mile away. Jaime, however, discovered a path used by the boys, it started near the castle gate and zig-zagged between the rocks and the juniper bushes. He tried to climb it, and it was much faster than the road.

Jaime went to the beach every day but didn’t meet his son. “Perhaps the boy came to swim at another time, or maybe he was just busy”, - he calmed himself.

Finally, one day, Jaime saw him, standing on a cliff and throwing stones at the sea. Jaime went up to the boy.

“You’re alone today. Where are your friends?” - He threw a rock in the water, too.  
The boy was upset about something.  
“I wanted to be alone.”  
“Sorry’, - Jaime replied and started leaving.  
“Stay”, - his son asked.

Jaime was watching the kid, something was bothering him. After a little thinking, the boy said.

“Remember you’ve said some words had to wait for their time? If you say them sooner or later, you can ruin everything.  
“I do. Have you said something at the wrong time?”  
“Yes, I think I was rushed.”  
“What did you say? Whom?”

A boy breathed a sigh.

“To my mother, I told her that when I became a knight, I would serve in the Kingsguard.”

“It is very honourable”, - Jaime supported him.  
“So why did mother get upset and said she wouldn’t let that happen? She was a knight, too, she was a Lord Commander. I thought she’d be happy.”  
Jaime wondered how to explain to the boy that although it was a very honourable mission, not every mother would want her only son, her heir, to devote himself to the service of the king?

“You see, your mother has no one but you. The life of a knight, especially a king's guard, is difficult and dangerous, and, I think, she’s afraid of losing you. Besides, you know that members of the Kingsguard can’t get married and have children? And you are the future of the House of Tarth. Your mother has high hopes for you.”

The boy took a heavy breath.

“I wish I had brothers and sisters.”

Such a remark very amused Jaime, he smiled and thought. “Well, well, I will take care to fix it”.

“So what now? Shall I give up on my dream?” - The kid just kept resenting.

“No way’, - Jaime cheered him up, - “I just explained to you your mother’s position. And you, if you really want to do it, get it. But in the meantime, I’m sorry, no one will take you as a squire. I know what I’m saying - I was a boy, too, and I dreamed of knighthood. You need to grow up, and you need to get stronger, and you need to learn a lot. I’m not just talking about riding and sword playing. You must know history, geography, numbers, you must learn to write properly and beautifully, to express your thoughts clearly. A true knight must know everything.”

“My mother also says so.”

“Your mother is a wise woman. I’m sure she understands that someday you’ll be leaving home anyway, but it’s hard for her to accept that now because you’re only ten years old. But when the time comes, she’ll let you go. After all, she knows exactly what it’s like to have an adventure”. Jaime winked at his son.

“Maybe she’ll knight me”, - boy was dreaming.

“Maybe she, or maybe... some other knight”, - Jaime was dying to be that knight.

The kid breathed dreamily. Then he thought about something and suddenly he looked up at Jaime appreciatingly.

“Can you do all that stuff you were talking about?”

“Unfortunately, that realization came to me much later. And I had to learn in the process.”

“Did you learn to fight with your left hand?” - The boy’s got a little squint.

“Yeah. It wasn’t easy, but I had no choice.”

“And you’re good at it?”

“As you can see, I’m still alive”, - Jaime answered with the same squint.

He took his sword out of the scabbard. Of course, it’s not the Widow’s Wail, the sword Jaime used to fight, but a perfectly good weapon he bought in Braavos. He swang his sword a few times, did a couple of strokes, showing the boy he was pretty good at it.

“Teach me to fight with my left hand”, - his son asked him. – “You’ve said I had to study a lot, I’m ready.”

Jaime looked with respect at his son.

“Well, come tomorrow with your sword. Same time.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Imagine you don’t have your right hand. Do your left: dress, eat, write...”  
> “It will be difficult’, - the boy thought aloud.  
> Jaime knew his son needed a challenge.  
> “Well, if it’s difficult... you can say no. No one will judge you.”  
> Jaime stood up, making it clear that the lesson was over. His son stood in front of him, looking right in his face. Jaime saw in his eyes that the challenge had been accepted.  
> “I’ll be here tomorrow. With swords.”

Jaime’s been feeling a little excited since morning. It was going to be perfect - he would teach his son how to fight with swords. Yes, thousands of men are training their heirs, but how many of them found their sons only ten years after he was born? He barely waited for the right time and rushed to the beach. The boy was already there, standing on a cliff where they were talking the day before and had already started training.

Jaime went up to him.

“I don’t think this is the right place’, - he noticed – “here we are in the open, I’m sure without the audience our training will be more effective.”

The boy nodded.  
“And probably I’d ask you not to tell anyone in the castle that I’m training you.”

The son grinned at him.  
“I wanted to ask you the same. I want to surprise my mother.”

“Believe me, my boy, there are plenty of surprises for her”, - Jaime thought.

They walked a little away from the harbour, and then went down to a small beach, surrounded by the cliffs on three sides, leaving only a small area. The place was perfect.  
Jaime noticed a sword hanging on his son’s belt.

“You got an iron sword? I thought boys of your age fight with a wooden sword.”

Jaime Jr. proudly drew his weapon.  
“I’ve been practising with this sword for a year.”

“Let me see?” - Jaime took his son’s sword. Pretty light, made especially for a ten-year-old boy, but made in a very nice, well-balanced way, and judging by the scratches, it’s used a lot. – “This is a good weapon”, - he summed up, - “your armourer knows his trade.”

The boy was bloated with pride.

“I have a real sword, made of Valyrian steel. By the way’, - he boasts.

“Your mother’s sword, you mean?” - Jaime specified.  
‘No’, - the boy shook his head, - “my mother does have a Valyrian sword – Oarthkeeper. But I have my own.”

Jaime tried to hide his excitement under the mask of indifference.

“Two Valyrian swords in the same family. You’re lucky.”

He knew where the second sword came from.

He saw a picture of the past: their last encounter with Tyrion. His brother, risking his life, freed him from captivity, told him how to safely get Cersei out of the Red Keep, and assured him that Jaime would give the order to surrender the city. When Tyrion came out of the tent, Jaime called him. He knew he was likely to die, but he wanted to leave behind some memory of him and apologize to the one he offended so unfairly.

“Tyrion! If I don’t return, give my sword to Brienne.”

Tyrion understood everything - a knight could bequeath his sword to only the closest person.  
“He fulfilled my request”, - Jaime thought with gratitude.

The boy continued his story.  
“This sword was once called Widow’s Wail. But my mother and I decided it was an inappropriate name for a glorious weapon. And since I got it from my father, we named it Legacy. Isn’t that a good name?”  
“Very good”, - Jaime agreed with him. – “Have you tried using it yet?”  
“Of course!”

In the tone of his son, Jaime noticed notes of bragging. And he even knew from whom the boy inherited the trait.  
“But it’s a little heavy for me’, - the boy sighs, and then he remembers why they’re actually here, - “so we’ll train?”

They’re in a position now.  
“First take the sword to your right hand. I want to see how you’re prepared.”  
Jaime Jr. shifted the sword, and they started. He attacked and his father fought back. It worked pretty well.

“Who’s been working with you?” - Jaime asked while continuing the fight.  
“Ser Podrick”, - answered the son, without stopping his attack. – “We train two hours a day. And sometimes Mother does her own work with me”, - he added, making a lunge.  
“Did she teach you that?” - Jaime easily broke up the attack and moved on. They were circling the ground, and Jaime noticed that the kid still kept up with him.

“Yeh”, - his son answered briefly, - “and she also taught me how to do this!” - He went on a counteroffensive, and Jaime was struck by a cascade of blows. He retreated and raised his hand, showing that the fight was over.

The boy was very good. Jaime had already imagined how he would become the best sword of the seven kingdoms in the future.  
“Your swordplay is great”. – Jamie praised his boy. – “Now, let’s start the training. But first I have to prepare something.”

During the improvised battle, Jaime realized that he had done something foolish: he had a real battle sword in his hands. When it came to protection, it was not a big problem, but now Jaime had to attack. He cut a branch from the platen that dew above the rock shattered the bitch on it and took it like a sword

“Are you going to fight with a stick?” – the boy was insulted.

“I’m sorry, but I won’t risk attacking you with a real sword. If you can bring two training ones tomorrow, we’ll be on an equal footing, but for now, let’s do it in this way.. Trust me, you’ll be grateful to me”, - he winked to his son. – “I’m going to teach you the way I was taught. I just don’t know any other way. It’s gonna be cruel and painful. Are you ready?”

The boy silently nodded and put the sword in his left hand. But before he could take it properly, Jaime had already knocked it out with his stick.  
“Hey”, - the son screamed, - “it’s not fair!”  
“I told you so!”

The boy understood the rules of the game: Jaime attacked, and he tried his best to hold the sword in his hand. It wasn’t easy, he dropped his sword often, fell twice, and once was hit right on his knuckles. Tears ran into his eyes, but he clenched his teeth and did not give the impression that he was in pain. Half an hour later, Jaime retreated.

“That’s enough for today.”

But Jaime Jr.was determined to continue training.

“Come on! I think I’m getting good”, - he required.

“No. that’s enough,” – Jamie said, he took his son’s hand. The abrasions were bleeding. Suddenly, he felt something sting in his eyes. He wanted to kiss those abrasions like his mother used to do, so they would heal quickly.

“What’s wrong with you?” - his son asked, - “your eyes are red.”

“I think I got sand in them”. - Jaime smiled and patted him on the top of the head. – “Go home. You need to rest.”  
“But I’m not tired!”  
“You’ll say it tomorrow.”

Jaime knew how his left arm would hurt. He’d been there before.  
Jaime Jr. put his sword in the scabbard.

“This time tomorrow, right?”  
The older Jamie nodded.  
“And the two swords.”

They nodded each other like two comrades united by a common secret.

*****  
Jaime’s prediction came true: the next day the boy looked tired.

“Mother saw your bruises?”  
The boy nodded.

“How did you explain it to her?”  
“I said it was during training.”

“So we framedPodrick?” - Jaime laughed.  
“No. He’s not the only one I train with. My mother knows about it.”

Jaime put down his sword and took a training course. They were training under the same plan. Jaime Jr. started rather glibly, but he tired very quickly and started missing the blows more often than the day before. He was angry, and that’s why he was even more wrong. His father decided to stop training.

He saw that his son was in pain. He felt sorry for him because he was just a little boy.

“No!” - his son was angry, - “I want to fight!”  
Jaime approached him and gently grabbed his chin. The boy’s lips trembled, his eyelashes shed tears.

“Let’s try it again”, - he spoke through his teeth.  
This kind of spirit impressed Jaime. He was back in position. This time, he was trying to strike lightly, softly. “A boy shouldn’t feel like a loser, I should give him a fighting chance”. Jaime’s son felt more confident this time, even tried to attack. But every minute he got weaker and weaker, he kept wanting to help himself with his right hand. When Jaime offered to stop, he didn’t argue anymore.

He fell on the sand, Jaime sat next to him.

“Why can’t I do it?”  
“You’re doing it well”, - his father spoke softly.  
The boy shook his head.  
“You’re calming me down, I know.”  
“Do you think I did it right away? No, buddy, I had to work a lot to be a decent fighter. How long have you been learning to fight with your right hand?”

Little Jaime was sniffing.  
“Five.”

“See? Your left is only the second day. Really hurts?” – Jaime asked and the boy nodded. The father took his son’s arm in his hand and started massaging it, - “I think I figured out what your problem is. You know, you’re used to doing everything with your right hand, and then your left hand isn’t prepared at all. You need to develop it, make it work more.

“How?” – his son asked.

“Imagine you don’t have your right hand. Do your left: dress, eat, write...”  
“It will be difficult’, - the boy thought aloud.  
Jaime knew his son needed a challenge.  
“Well, if it’s difficult... you can say no. No one will judge you.”  
Jaime stood up, making it clear that the lesson was over. His son stood in front of him, looking right in his face. Jaime saw in his eyes that the challenge had been accepted.  
“I’ll be here tomorrow. With swords.”

Jaime watched his son run away. He was filled with love and pride. How harmoniously the best qualities of his parents have blended in this boy: the father’s tenacity and ease, the mother’s dedication and hard work.

“My son”, - he said first quietly, then repeated louder, - “My son. Jaime Lannister, son of Jaime Lannister, grandson of Tywin Lannister”. - he looked up to the sky as if addressing to his parent – “father, I gave you a grandchild you could truly be proud of.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “The lion is the sigil of the House of Lannisters’, - Jaime remarked thoughtfully, - is your father a Lannister?”  
> The boy shook his head.  
> “I don’t think so. My mother’s sword has the same symbol, and she’s not a Lannister. That’s for sure,” - his son made a strong statement, and then added – “she doesn’t like them at all.”

The younger Jaime was sitting on a rock, snot, gently swinging the bandage off the right hand. The elder Jaime’s heart fell, when he saw this.

“What happened to the hand?” - He looked at it carefully, there was no damage, the arm was absolutely healthy.  
“Nothing. I just ate my breakfast with my left-hand today”, - the answer came, - “So, I had to say my right-hand hurts. My mother took me to the maester, who was surprised, but just in case put the bandage”, - the boy looked up to his father, - “you know, it’s so disgusting to lie to someone who believes in you. My mother pities me, but I cheat on her. It’s terrible when you have to break one promise to keep another. Have you ever done that?”

Jaime started thinking. He had to take a lot of vows, and a lot of them had to be broken. Life is very contradictory, but now he has to give his son an answer.

“Alas, but it happens, my friend. When you find yourself in a situation like this, you have to decide what’s more important at the moment, what’s more right.”

The son looked at his father.  
“If I decided to tell my mother the truth, would you be mad at me?”  
“No”, - Jaime shook his head, - “I’d know it’s more important to you.”

The boy was thinking. For a few minutes, he looked away silently, he made a decision.

“I won’t lie to my mother, but I won’t do the same for you. I’ll just work with my left hand in secret so no one can see.”

Jaime liked his son’s idea of compromise.

Today the training was more successful. Jaime still tried to attack less aggressively, the boy gained confidence and repelled more successfully.  
“He will learn,’ - Jaime thought, - “he just needs time.”

They sat on the sand tired but satisfied and chatted,

“I’ll try to bring the Legacy to practice one day”, - the boy said.  
“What for?” - Jaime was surprised.  
“Last time I told you about it, I thought you wanted to see it, didn’t you?”  
Jaime was thinking. Suddenly, he was anxious to see his sword, to take his hilt, to feel its weight.  
“I think you’ll show it to me one day. But don’t bring it here, your mother won’t be happy about it. You'd better tell me, what’s it like?”

The boy turned his eyes admirably.

“It’s gorgeous! Have you ever seen a Valyrian sword?” - Jaime nodded and his son continued, - “the steel is cast in black and red. It’s very sharp, I even cut myself once when I wanted to touch it. It’s so long!” - the boy put his hands wide to show the length of the sword. Jaime laughed, his son exaggerated a little bit, but it was common for boys, - “and on the pommel, it has the head of a lion”, - the younger Jaime added

“The lion is the sigil of the House of Lannisters’, - Jaime remarked thoughtfully, - is your father a Lannister?”  
The boy shook his head.  
“I don’t think so. My mother’s sword has the same symbol, and she’s not a Lannister. That’s for sure,” - his son made a strong statement, and then added – “she doesn’t like them at all.”

This statement surprised Jaime.  
“Your mother doesn’t like the Lannisters? What makes you say that?”  
“I’ve learned that when the Hand came to visit.”

Jaime jumped out of surprise.  
“Tyrion was here?”  
“The Lord Hand? Yeh. He came shortly after Grandpa died.”  
“Did he see you?” - He asked the boy with excitement.  
“Of course. We talked a lot. I liked him,” - he made a lot of jokes and he talked to my mother so amicably, I don’t understand why she got mad at him.”  
“What did he talk with you about?”  
“I told the Lord Hand that I was going to be a knight, to serve in the King's Guard. And he asked if I would go with him to King’s Landing.”  
“And what did you say?”  
“I said I wanted to,” - the boy thought a minute, - “that’s probably why it started. Then I heard him talking to my mother in high tones. I didn’t want to eavesdrop, it was an accident’, - the boy started to justify it.

Jaime calmed him down.  
“I believe you’,- he understood his son’s embarrassment, but he was very interested in what happened next. So he asked his son to continue.  
“The Lord Hand told my mother something about Casterly Rock and King’s Landing, reminded her of some document the King gave. He wanted me to go with him, but where, I didn’t understand’,- the boy sighed, - “and then mother said that this town had taken away her most precious thing and she didn’t want it to happen again. And then she said she didn’t want any more Lannisters in our house.”

Jaime laughed bitterly. Poor Brienne, she doesn’t want to admit that a true Lannister has been living under her roof for ten years.  
“What about Tyrion?” - He asked.  
“The Hand? I think he was very upset. But he wasn’t angry, he just said she couldn’t keep me for long, and sooner or later I’d find out’, - the boy fell silent and spent a few minutes thinking, - “what will I know about?”  
“I think you should ask your mother.”  
But what if she doesn’t want to talk?”  
“Then perhaps these are the words that await their time?”

*****  
It’s been a few weeks since Jaime settled on Tarth. Every day he saw his son, taught him to fight with his left hand, recognized him more and more, he knew almost everything about his life in the castle, his relationship with his mother, and his dreams. He had the hope of becoming a friend to his son.

The first half of the plan was done, and then there was the second half. And then Jaime realized that he didn’t know what to do next. 

He tried several times to make some kind of plan, but something stopped him. He was putting off thinking about it for the evening, for tomorrow morning, until he realized the reason for the delays - it was fear. He was afraid that Brienne would not forgive him, that she would reject him. Now, until he hadn’t started to act, he had hope, but he panicked that all his hopes would crumble if she said “no’. 

He gave himself a deadline: as soon as his son was more or less able to fight with his left hand, he would go to Brienne. The boy, as if he had been aware of this condition, was showing more and more progress every day. Jaime understood that there was no time to wait.

And suddenly the reason to think more seriously appeared.

For a few days, younger Jaime was missing training. The elder figured it out why – there were guests in the castle. Ser Butler and his sons arrived on the island a few days ago, apparently, the presence of the guests required the young heir to be in the castle. Finally, the Butlers departed and Jaime was able to see his son. He had no idea the boy would be so happy to see him, he ran to their playground out of the bushes and joyfully welcomed his older friend.

“Did you have any visitors?” - Jaime decided to do reconnaissance.  
“Yep, the old Lord Butler and his sons Reddit and Murdoch. They brought so many people with them! We’ve never had so much in the castle. You know the real theatre came with them! I’ve never seen anything like it! - the boy shared his delight.

“Were you interested in them?” - Jaime felt jealous. It seemed to him that he had taken a significant place in his son’s heart, and then it turned out that some Butlers were able to conquer him with the aid of a stray theatre in just a week!

Yanger Jaime smiled at the corner of his mouth.  
“The theatre was good. And the lords were very kind.”

Jaime was getting angry.  
So, why did these very kind lords leave so soon?”

The answer caused him to stun still.  
“Because my mother refused them.”

In Jaime’s head, one thought led another: “What means “refused”? With what proposal did the old Butler come to her?”

He turned to his son.  
“Did he ask for your mother’s hand?”

“Yeah. He wanted her to marry the youngest, Reddit. He’s the third person to come with such an offer,” – his son continued, - “a month ago there were the Coningtons and last year - the Estermonts.”

Jaime’s eyes went dark. He’s such an arrogant fool. He was so sure of his right to Brienne that he didn’t think anyone else could claim her hand. Although she was no longer a young maiden and had an illegitimate child, she remained a piece of cake for the youngest son of some Estermont or Butler. Of course, she is Lady Tarth, the Evenstar, and her line comes from the Andals. And if she gives birth to any Connington, it is his, not Jaime’s son, who will inherit the island.”

Jaime was gasping for anger. He was angry only at himself, he was procrastinating too much.   
‘Tomorrow,» - he decided.

“You’re not well?’ – asked the boy, - “I’m talking to you and you’re not listening.”

“I’m sorry. What do you want?”  
“Are we going to train today? I haven’t practised for seven days, I’m afraid I’ll lose my form.”

Jaime gently shattered his son’s hair.

“Tomorrow, my boy, you and I will train in the court of the castle”, - he said in his mind, took the sword, and stand in the position.

“Shall we begin, my lord?”  
The boy grabbed his sword and immediately attacked. Today’s training was brilliant, Jaime was fighting with all his enthusiasm looking forward to tomorrow, the boy seemed to have been exposed by his father, and with a thrill attacked again and again. The swords did not stop for an hour and the blades flashed in the light of the outgoing sun.

Finally, wet and tired, they fell to the sand.

“What are your plans for tomorrow?” - Jaime asked looking up into the rosy sky.

“Nothing important,” - his son replied, - “And yours?”  
“My plans are- grandiose,” - Jaime was looking forward to the surprise of his son. He’s already tried several times to tell him who he really is. But common sense stopped him - the first talk to Brienne.  
“What’s the plan? Tell me!” - his son was harassing him. But all he got a mysterious smile.  
“You’ll find out tomorrow.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaime stayed up all night. He lay in his bed and dreamt. He dreamed of the one he loved and desired all these years. For ten years, he’d never been with a woman, only she was his happiness, his life, his dream. Brienne. He imagined her bright blue eyes, her warm soft lips, her strong and resilient body. The anticipation of her intimacy drove him insane. He was sure she was waiting for him, she loved him, still. How else could he explain her persistent reluctance to marry representatives of such respected houses? She doesn’t know he’s alive, that he’s around, but her love tells her not to rush in, that he will find her. And even if her heart is full of resentment at him, he will find the right words.

*****  
Jaime stayed up all night. He lay in his bed and dreamt. He dreamed of the one he loved and desired all these years. For ten years, he’d never been with a woman, only she was his happiness, his life, his dream. Brienne. He imagined her bright blue eyes, her warm soft lips, her strong and resilient body. The anticipation of her intimacy drove him insane. He was sure she was waiting for him, she loved him, still. How else could he explain her persistent reluctance to marry representatives of such respected houses? She doesn’t know he’s alive, that he’s around, but her love tells her not to rush in, that he will find her. And even if her heart is full of resentment at him, he will find the right words.

Jaime fell asleep at the end of the night. In his dream, he was with Brienne. It was not the first time he had such dreams, but this time, when they were only a few hours away, the sensation was particularly acute. “Brienne”, he mumbled in his sleep and woke up. There was still sulphur outside the window, but far beyond the mountains, the sky was already painted pink. 

“Today”, said Jaime.

He went up and went to the window, it went out to sea. The harbour was right in the palm, and the ship broke off the dock. Jaime looked - a standard with the Tarth sigil was waving at the mast. At first, Jaime was just admiring the view, but then he started thinking, it’s an official ship and only members of the Tarth family could be on it.

He ran down to the dining room. The innkeeper just woke up and, yawning, opened the shutters. Jaime, trying to hide the nervousness, asked:  
“What kind of ship leaves the harbour?”

The innkeeper looked out the window.

“This one?” - She’s yawning again, - “Evenstar, it’s our lady’s ship.”  
“Who’s on it?” - Jaime’s heart was racing, waiting for an answer.  
“How do I know?” - The host answered and went to the kitchen.  
“What do you want for breakfast, Bran?” - She yelled from there. Jaime didn’t hear her.

He had a bad feeling. Brienne had gone. Where? Why? Maybe the son was wrong, and she finally accepted Butler’s offer and now she’s going to her own wedding? He ran to the dock, where the ship came from. The black salt-soaked old man rolled the rope.

“Has Lady Tarth’s ship left?” - Jaime asked, who was out of breath.  
“Exactly, m'lord”, - the old man answered with his toothless mouth, - “our Lord Selwyn once sailed on it, and now Lady Brienne. I remember her as a little brat, and now she is the lady.” – He was giggling.  
“Has the lady boarded herself? Did you see?” - Jaime wanted to grab the old man’s neck so he could stop giggling.  
“That’s right, m'lord, with your own feet.”  
“Where did the ship go?”  
“To the capital, m'lord, King’s Landing.”

That’s good. Jaime was happy it wasn’t Storm End, where the Butlers were going. What’s she gonna do in King’s Landing? Maybe she’s decided to accept Tyrion’s offer, and she’s taking her son to the capital? Well, then, it’s not a big deal - he’s going there, too. He’s not gonna be as stupid as he was, he’s gonna find them in King’s Landing.

“Tell me, my friend”, he addressed the old man, - “Were Lady’s son and Ser Podrick on the ship, too?”  
“No. The Lady Tarth pleased to travel alone. The young lord and Ser Podrick have stayed in the castle.”

Jaime threw the old man a silver coin.  
“Thank you, my friend, drink for the safe return of Lady Tarth.”

Jaime’s soul calmed down. Brienne couldn’t leave her son for long. Whatever called her to King’s Landing, she’ll be back soon. And he’ll wait for her.

*****  
Jaime spent the whole morning wondering why Brienne went to King’s Landing. He should know. The only person he could have approached with this question was his son. All he could do is wait for the meeting. Jaime tried very hard to please his master to let him go early, and finally, he got to their secret place.

The boy was already here, he sat on a rock and focused on sharpening his sword. When he saw Jaime, he got excited, jumped up on his feet to meet him.

“Did you know?” - he asked instead of saying hello.

Jaime was at a loss.  
“What do you mean?”

“Yesterday, you said you were preparing a surprise for today. I thought it had something to do with my mother’s departure.”

Jaime was thinking. Indeed, yesterday he hinted to his son that something unexpected and pleasant was going to happen for him today. But it had nothing to do with Brienne's departure, and what’s more, her leaving ruined everything he had to do. But how could he explain it to his son? He looked at him in anticipation of the surprise. Jaime couldn’t disappoint his son. He was feverishly thinking what could please him, amuse him? And so, as long as he hadn’t thought of anything, he decided to distract the boy with a conversation.

“I didn’t know your mother was going on the road. Where did he go?”  
“To King’s Landing. I didn’t know anything either. A raven flew in yesterday afternoon, and mother ordered to get ready the ship, and at dawn, it sailed.”

The boy’s voice was sad, he didn’t seem happy about the separation. And then Jaime finally figured out a way to entertain his son.  
“Did you ever sail?”  
“Yes, once or twice we sailed on our ship.”  
“No, that’s not what I mean?” - Jaime was excited, - “not on a great boat with a dozen sailors and a master’s cabin. But on a small boat where only you and the sea?”  
“No, not at all.”  
“Then hurry up!’ - Jaime winked at his son.

He marched decisively towards the port, his son could barely keep up with him.  
“You should have told me not to take the swords”, - he heard a voice behind his back that was angry.

And he looked back - at his son’s thigh was a sword, a second one, meant for Jaime, in his hands. It slowed him further. Indeed, swords are absolutely unnecessary now.  
“They need to be left somewhere”, - Jaime thought. He looked back, they were near the inn where he lived.

“Do you want to see how I live?” - He suggested to his son, – “come to my room, leave swords there.”

They flew through the dining room of the inn and went up to the second floor where Jaime’s room was.

The boy came in and looked over the room. Jaime, too, stared at it, and he was ashamed. He should have thought of that before inviting the boy into this den. He left his apartment in such a hurry this morning that he did not clean the bed, there was leftover of his dinner on the table, and on the chair, there was a pile of clothes that he had been planning to give to the laundry for several days.

“I’m sorry, I’m such a slob”, - he smiled, as if to apologize for the mess, he threw the clothes and on the bed, moved the chair to younger Jaime, offering to sit down, - “you can put the swords on the table.”

The boy smiled condescendingly.  
“Don’t worry. It’s the same in my room.”

Jaime turned around.  
“Don’t the servants clean up the chambers of the young lord?”  
“No”, - the boy answered by sitting on the proposed chair, ‘ mother told them not to touch my things. I do everything myself.”  
“Do you even do the cooking?” – Jaime smirked to his son.  
“No, I can’t cook yet. We usually dine in the dining room with mother and Ser Podrick. The servants serve us. But if I want to eat in my room, then have to take the dishes to the kitchen myself. Sometimes I’m too lazy to do it, and then there’s a lot of stuff piling up’, - he laughed watching at his dad’s table.

Jaime once again wondered how much his son was alike him.

He took the boy to the port, found his new friend, and sometimes his drinking buddy, Lorc, who owned a small but strong sailboat, and rented it for an hour for two silver coins.

The weather was favourable for a sea walk, the sea was calm, but the wind was strong enough to set sail. During ten years, Jaime had learned to do it with one hand, helping himself with only a little bit of the right. But today, he found it much easier because his son helped him. They went out on the open sea, driven by the warm southern wind. Jaime, as a child, rejoiced as he watched his son shake his hair with the wind and salty splashes in his face. They moved far enough away from the shore. Jaime stared thoughtfully at a distant island surrounded by bright blue waters.

'Sapphire Island”, - he sounded it thoughtfully.  
“What?” ~ asked his son.

Jaime laughed.  
“You know, some people believe that Tarth is called a sapphire island because there are sapphire deposits here.”  
The boy laughed too.  
“Yeah, I’ve heard that legend. I guess those who believe that have never been here.”  
“Sure”, - Jaime answered, - “and I don’t think they will.”

“Can I swim here?”- suddenly my son asked.  
Jaime thought the sea was calm enough, and if the boy wasn’t going far from the boat, why not? He lowered his sail, and the boat was stationary but it swayed on the waves.

The kid immediately took off all his clothes. Jaime, looking at this, thought his son, like a true warrior, was not ashamed of his naked body.  
“Hey!” - his son was waving his arms out of the water, - “don’t you want to swim?”  
The temptation was great, but Jaime preferred simply to watch his boy, as a real dolphin, swam in the waves. He looked east, the sun came closer to the horizon.  
“Jaime, we have to get back’.- He had to cut off his son’s entertainment.

There was still a long way to shore, and Jaime decided to ask for details about Brienne’s departure.  
“Do you know why your mother was rushed to King’s Landing?”  
“The Queen of the North is in the capital now, the sister of our king. She wants to see my mother. She served her once, didn’t you know?”  
“Your mother served the Queen of the North? No, I didn’t.”  
“Well, she served her, even before she became the queen. When she was just Lady Winterfell.”  
“I heard about Lady Winterfell. By the way, how did your mother get into her service? North is far from the Storm Lands.”

Jaime knew the story perfectly well, but he was keen to hear it in Brienne’s interpretation.  
He was disappointed by his son’s story. His name was so rarely mentioned in passing that he even felt resentment. “It’s okay, my boy, wait for a little, and I’ll tell you how it really was and with all the details”, - he thought.

“And then Lady Sansa became Queen of the North’, - the boy finished the story.

Why did your mother leave her? - Jaime asked, - “according to your story, she loved the North.”  
“Yes, she did. My mother used to say that she was truly happy in the north,” - - the boy silenced, apparently, trying to imagine what made his mother happy in that far hard land, - “and what about you? Do you like the North?”

The question was sudden and provocative. Jaime was feverishly recollecting all their conversations. He never mentioned being in the North.  
“Have I ever said I was in the North?”  
“Wasn’t you? You told me you’d been everywhere.”

There was something very familiar about Jaime in that look. That raised eyebrow, the tilt of his head... the boy is not so simple. What answer does he expect to hear? Jaime waited and the boy waited.  
“I hate the North”, - he answered.

Why is he laughing? The boy tried to hide his laughter, but he couldn’t do it.  
“I said something funny?” - Jaime was confused.  
“No,” - the boy wasn’t holding back the happy smile anymore, - “I just guessed your answer”.- He leaned over the side, put his hand in the water, scooped a handful of water, and flung it in Jaime’s face laughing. – “Don’t be angry. I just like to guess the answers and I’m very happy when I do.”

“Strange game,” - Jaime thought. He had not noticed it before. These unexpected questions and sudden joy confused him. What else could he ask? Jaime looked at his son and knew there were still a lot of questions in his soul.  
“Can I ask you something else?” – now his son’s voice wasn’t so cheerful.  
A sudden change of heart puzzled Jaime. He prepared for another surprise.  
“Well, come on.”

“Do you think if the King asked my mother to be the Lord Commander again, would she agree?”

A thought like that never left Jaime. He suspected that Brienne might have been lured to King’s Landing under the pretext of a meeting of old friends, to be kept at court. Perhaps Sansa wants her to return to her service, or the King has decided that she has already devoted enough time to her son, and now demands that she return to her duties as Lord Commander? He was struck by a panic attack again, as when he was when he learned of Brienne’s grooms. He looked into his son’s eyes and saw the same fear in them. If Brienne accepts one of these offers, they’ll both lose her forever. But she won’t. Ten years ago, she had determined for herself what was the most important thing in her life, and she would never give up on it.

Jamie took his son’s face in his hands.

“No”. – he stated firmly. - “I’m sure she’ll never leave you. You are worth every guard, every king, and queen put together. Know this.”

The kid took a breath and gave him a small smile.

“I was upset at first that she didn’t take me with her”,- he confessed, - “but now I think it’s better. She’ll be back to Tarth soon. And I’m here to make sure she doesn’t stay there too long.”

Jaime walked his son to the beach path. He returned to his home in deep reflection. He seemed to have learned his son well enough, but his behaviour today puzzled him. Why is he suddenly picking on him with these questions about the North? And this weird smile of his... like he’s figured out some secret. Jaime wondered what conflicting feelings his boy was feeling: first laughing, then sad. And his sudden claim that Brienne should be back very soon?

So, in his thoughts, he went into the dining room and headed for the stairs leading up.

“Bran!” - His innkeepers called.  
“Thank you, Marika, I’m not hungry,” - - without looking back, replied Jaime, suggesting that she wanted to offer him dinner.

Someone grabbed him by the arm and stopped him sharply. He turned around - right in front of his face, he saw Marika’s face red with anger.  
“Since when do you hang out with the little lord? What are you up to, you filthy bastard? Found a pretty boy? Where’d you come from? From Braavos or Pentos? Maybe there it’s common to take boys to your rooms but not here! And what you’re up to, you bastard! Of all the boys, you chose our lady’s son! Why did you take him to his room?” 

She spits out every sentence in his face, stepping on him.

Finally, Jaime got the sense of her accusation. He was put out. How could she even think of that? He pushed her away angrily.

“What are you talking about, you stupid cow? How could you imagine that? He was in my room for one minute, so we went to leave his swords they wouldn’t bother him. I had no intention of offending the boy, much less insulting his family. I myself will kill the first person who dares to touch him!”

The angry face and angry words made the innkeeper doubt her suspicions. She retreated but continued to look at Jaime's askance.  
“I may be mistaken. But you should know that Tarth has always had respect for its landlords, and everyone here must dote on the boy. If anything should happen to him, there will be no waiting for Lady Brienne’s return or for the trial, you will be found and killed on the spot.”

Jaime was struck by such selfless devotion to the house and the love for his son. He looked up to Marika with respect and spoke.  
‘Nothing will happen to him if I’m around.”

The swords were still on the table in Jaime’s room. He smiled at them, remembered the conversation with Marika. Could his friendship with the boy be so misconstrued? They’ve been going out for almost a month, and he didn’t think it would look suspicious. Praise the gods that they were practising on a remote beach, otherwise, rumours would have spread. With regret, Jaime thought he should limit his contact with his son to convince Marika that she had made a mistake in her hunches and that no other such thoughts should arise. A lot of people saw them together today, saw him take the boy to his room, saw them sail together on a boat. And if someone decides to enlighten the young lord, what danger does a strange man pose to him? His whole body was covered in a cold sweat. It’ll turn his son away from him forever. No, he’ll be careful. With his heart tied, Jaime decided until he could open up, he would spend less time with his son.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Mate, you know there are men who like, how do you say, boys...”
> 
> The kid swung off and bludgeoned his eyes out.
> 
> “No, I’m not like that!” - Jaime Immediately reacted, - “ I swear to you. I love women!”

Jaime went to see his son with a heavy heart. He has to lie. To lie to the boy he had taught that there’s nothing worse than lying to a loved one. It was disgusting.

The son was waiting for him. First, training.

During the training, Jaime’s mind was filled with work: how best to explain to the kid the whole situation and not to offend him, not to disappoint him? He really went to pieces.

“Hey”, - the boy was unhappy with his teacher’s passivity, - “ you haven’t slept, have you?”

Jaime sat on a rock and patted his hand on it, inviting his son to sit down beside him.

“Come here, Jaime, I want to tell you something.”  
The boy sat obediently, he kept his eye on his teacher.  
“It’s very important. I hope you’ll understand.”

The boy looked with his eyes opened wide and he couldn’t breathe.

“Are you gonna say that now?” - He whispered.

Jaime didn’t understand his son’s excitement.  
“Are you excited about something?”

“Speak”, - he ordered him with a hoarse voice.

“I’m sorry, mate, but circumstances are such that I can’t see you often. My employer requires my continued presence in the shop, and there are other matters...” - Jaime felt like a traitor, - “We can train once a week or twice..” - Jaime saw his son’s face change, from joyous excitement to deep despair. – “Listen, he continued - it’s temporary, it’s necessary.”

But the boy no longer listened to him, his lips trembled and his eyes blinked frequently.

“Jaime”, - the man tried to grab the boy by the shoulders, but he pulled away, - “what’s going on with you? I said something wrong?”

“No,” - the boy shook his head, - “I just thought that you... but it wasn’t you...” - he had so much resentment and frustration in his voice. He took a doomed breath, stood up, and continued in a more even voice – “I just didn’t guess the answer. I’m sorry?” - and headed for the path.  
“Jaime!” - His father called, - “Will we train the day after tomorrow?”  
“No” - he didn’t turn around, - “they’re waiting for you at the shop.”

Jaime Lannister sat alone on a deserted beach until the late evening, he was concerned about the breakout with his son. It was his fault. The boy felt cheated. Brienne had a keen sense of deception, she thought it was the worst sin of all, a trait their son inherited from her, it was obvious.

“Have I lost him?” – Jaime thought In desperation, - “I was making plans for so long, was so close to finishing them, and ruined everything myself, with my own hands! No”, - he told himself, – “I’ll fix it. Now we have to take a break. He’s too insulted and won’t listen to me. He needs to cool down.”

Back in his room, Jaime was still spinning the conversation with his son. Again this stupid game! Why was he so upset that he didn’t guess his answer? What did he want to hear? What answer would satisfy him?

Jaime did not see his son for several days. He was comforting himself that the boy was in the castle, under the supervision of Podrick, the Maester, and the servants, who he was sure would not let anyone harm his young lord.”

Jaime sometimes walked towards the beach, hoping to see a boy from the distance.

And he did it once.

The boys were climbing the cliff again, among them Jaime saw a familiar figure. With a scream and a laugh, the children jumped into the water. Jaime was furious.  
“Oh, you little shit!” ~ the course rolled off his lips. He rushed to shore with all his legs. Jaime Junior was just coming out of the water. They stood in front of each other and breathed heavily.

“Jaime”, - the man finally broke the silence, - “you know you mustn’t do that.”  
The boy raised his head high, sticking out his chin.  
“Who are you to tell me what to do? You’re nobody to me, not a mentor! Not a...”  
“Where, by the way, is your useless mentor?” - Jaime freaked out,- “what did Brienne think about when she trusted her son to that half-wit Podrick? You promised your mother you wouldn’t dive!”

The boys came closer and surrounded them. Jaime sensed hostility in their views. He tried to see the situation from their side: the stranger grabbed his young lord by his shoulders and shouted at him. Jaime gave up and retreated.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have yelled. Let’s just talk.”

The boy breathed angrily and kept silent, but his eyes softened a bit.  
“I need to get dressed now.”

He gave a sign to his friends, and they got dressed too, then they stayed a little bit longer, and left.

Jaime watched them and concluded that if their lord had ordered them, they might have beaten him. It made him laugh and feel good, the boys obviously loved his son and were ready to protect him.

The youngest Jaime fell on the sand. He was quiet, waiting. “So, our boy has a character”,- the elder Jamie thought, - “he feels like the injured party and is in no hurry to start the conversation. I wonder how Brienne handles it?”

“Last time, did you take offence that I lied? I don’t understand this game of yours, but I’m sorry that I disappointed you. I apologize. I thought that would be better.”  
“But I don’t understand what happened. Everything was so good,” - it was the answer.  
“I’ll try to explain it to you. It’s going to be unpleasant, but I can see that I have no other choice.”

The boy was tense. He seemed to be waiting for some kind of kick again. Jaime took a few breaths. He had no idea he was ever gonna talk about it.

“Mate, you know there are men who like, how do you say, boys...”

The kid swung off and bludgeoned his eyes out.  
“No, I’m not like that!” - Jaime Immediately reacted, - “ I swear to you. I love women!”

The situation was both comical and tragic. Who would have thought that he would have to justify himself to his own son? But there was no other way, the boy feels the lies too keenly.

“I believe you, don’t worry”, - his son calmed him putting his hand on father’s, - “why do you say that to me?’

“Remember when you came to my room? Someone saw this and decided that I...“ - Jaime couldn’t go on, he hated the situation.  
“I understood, you wanted to spare me from these rumours’, - his wise son said quietly, probably imagining the scale of the disaster, if the gossip had loosened its tongues, - “thank you.”

He looked back at the path leading to the castle, making it clear that it was time for him to return.

But Jaime had another question.  
“You jumped off a cliff today. What about your promise to your mother?”  
“I thought, if she’s not on the island, I could jump a couple of times. Nothing happened, right?”

Jaime was outraged by it.  
“Do you really think that if your mother isn’t around, you can’t keep your word?”

The boy had his head down, he knew that he was doing wrong, but his insubordinate character made him disobey. Jaime knew it, all the boys are tempted to break the rules. It’s always been and always will be. But he is a father, and he has to explain to his son that a word given cannot be broken.

“You can’t break your promise if the person to whom it is given is far away. Moreover, a true knight is true to his oath, even if the one to whom it was given is dead. Didn’t your mother tell you that?”  
The boy nodded.  
“She did”  
Jaime nodded his head. They both knew what it was about.

“You’re not gonna jump off the cliff anymore, aren’t you?  
“No”, - his son shook his head. – “Until my mother frees me from that vow.”

Jaime was taken aback.  
“Do you really think she’ll ever do that?”  
“I hope so. How come I never have to dive into the sea before I’m old?”

Looking into his son’s mischievous eyes, listening to his laughing, Jaime rejoiced: his boy’s heart had melted, they were friends again.

Another question tormented him.  
“Jaime, this game of yours... I can’t figure it out. Explain it.”  
The boy only shook his head.  
“That time, you obviously wanted to hear something different, not what I wanted to say. What answer were you waiting for?”  
The boy shook his head again.

“I guess it’s not the time for those words yet,” - and he’s headed for the path, but then he turns around, - “Shall I take my swords tomorrow?”  
“Sure!”, - Jaime laughed.

“I’m pulled around by this little boy,” - he thought smiling, watching his son leaving. But this thought was not unpleasant to him.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brienne stopped laughing, looked sympathetically at his face, stood up, walked around the table, and hugged him from behind. She leaned over and kissed his hair.  
> “I will defeat you in battle, you know”, - she whispered in his ear, - “but you can always beat me on another field.”

It was the second week since Brienne left. Jaime’s son became sadder with every day.

“Do you miss her?”  
The boy nodded.  
“Very much. We’ve never been apart that long.”

“There is doubt again In his head”, - thought Jaime. – “though he tries to seem like an adult, and sometimes he does do and speaks reasonably, but he is still a little boy who is sad without a mother.”

He tried to cheer up his son.

“She’ll be back soon. In the meantime, let’s train so that when she comes back you can show all your strength.”

They got into position and started the fight. Jaime let his son attack him, and he was doing a good job. The ringing began to bounce off the rocks and ring over the water - the best music. Jaime noticed that the boy’s right arm was dangling like a whip. Of course, he tried not to use it, but usually, he used it for balance, and today it’s like he was preserved it. Jaime stopped the fight.

“What happened to your right arm?”  
The boy rolled up his sleeve and exposed his elbow, there was a bandage, but even through it, Jamie saw it was swelling.  
“I got hit when I fell down the stairs.”

Jaime got mad.  
“Podrick is an utterly incompetent educator! He must be removed from his service!”  
“No!" - boy offended for his mentor, - “he’s good! But he’s having a hard time, he’s torn between me and his wife...”

“Wife? Podrick’s married?” - Jaime asked.  
“Yep. His wife’s Lady Joanna. They have two daughters...”

Jaime tried to realize that while he was on his travels, things had changed here, too: the boys were raised, married, had children.

“And now she has to give birth to a third, the Maester says it will be a boy”, - his son continued.

Jaime understood Podrick as a man and as a father. Okay, let him take care of his family, and he’ll look after his own.  
“How did you fall?” - He asked his son.  
“I didn’t take the dishes away from my room for a week, but yesterday I was taking them to the kitchen and fell down the stairs. I hit my elbow and the back of my head.”  
Jaime reached out and gently touched the boy’s head, at the back of his head under his hair, he felt a big bump.  
“Did it hurt a lot?”  
“No’, - the kid smiled, - “it wasn’t so much the pain as the noise and the rattling. The whole castle came running, they were clucking at me like chickens.”  
«Of course there are”, - Jaime thought, - “the young lord almost broke his neck. Brienne will kill them if something happens to him.”

“Has the Maester seen you?”  
“Yeah, I’ve got some cold, and then it got easier. Today, it doesn’t hurt much anymore.”

Jaime knew it hurt, but he made it clear to his little knight that he believed him.  
“What did Ser Podrick say?”

“First he was really scared but then he was very angry. And he said if I wanted to eat in my room, I had to yake away the dishes every day.”

“That’s right,” Jaime agreed, - “you know, I’m lazy too, and I often have dirty dishes at night. Let’s agree that we each take away the dishes to the kitchen every day. I don’t think we can test each other, but we’ll give our word, won’t we?”  
The son agrees and extends his hand.  
They exchanged a handshake as a sign of agreement.

“You see, it’s great that you taught me how to fight with my left hand. If we were attacked now, I could defend myself,” - the boy said.  
Jaime grinned.  
“Yes, the two of us could defeat all the enemies.”  
“But if my mother were with us, we would be invincible”, - his son was smiling back at him.  
Jaime froze with his mouth open. The boy rose, dusted the sand off his pants, took the swords, said “See you tomorrow’ and walked down the path.

“He is right”,- Jaime thought, looking after his son, - “the three of us would be a great force. It is not because each of us is physically strong and prepared in our own way, no, we are strong in our belief in each other and love.”

*********  
“A raven has flown in this morning’,- said the younger Jaime, spitting on the sand next to his father.

“Is she coming back?” - The subject of Brienne’s return was so often in their conversations that it was unnecessary to specify who he was talking about.  
“No”, the boy took a deep breath.  
The words stuck in Jaime’s throat. ‘She couldn’t!”

The boy saw the surprise in his eyes and immediately added.  
“She’s running a little late. She was persuaded to stay for a few more days until the North Queen’s tourney ended” - - he tried his best to hide his frustration, but it was obvious – “I’ve never been to a joust” - he turned to Jaime, - “and you?”

He was thinking about it.

“I was. I remember the first tourney. I was probably older than you at the time”. - He started to remember, - “it was a tourney in honour of Prince Rhaegar’s name day. My father was the Hand of the King, and I lived with him. I was not yet a squire, I was simply allowed to replace one for the duration of the joust.”

Younger Jaime’s eyes expanded with surprise and enthusiasm.  
“Who did you serve to?”  
“Sir Baristan Selmy.”  
“Baristan the Valiant!” - The boy was choking, - “and how did you do it?”  
“I tried very hard, but I annoyed everyone and got in the way. After all, I was politely asked to stand aside.”  
Jaime laughed, but his son wasn’t funny. He sighed bitterly.

“If my father had been with us, he would have taken me to the tournament.”

Jaime understood his son. What boy doesn’t dream of a tourney? And this one, who had the blood of two knights in his veins, let alone. He put his hand on his son’s head.  
“You’re going to attend the joust. All in good time.”

The boy nodded comprehensibly and kept asking questions.  
“Have you ever taken part in a joust yourself?”  
“Yes. The last time it was a tourney in honour of Ned Stark, King Robert’s Hand, just before the outbreak of the War of the Five Kings”, - Jaime thought. How long ago it was! He was a completely different person back then. It didn’t seem to be with him at all.  
“Well, tell me!” - His son rushed him.  
“I was disgraced by a very young knight. Although I was a very strong warrior.

The memories came back on Jaime. But he wasn’t remembering the tourney. He was seeing Winterfell, him and Brienne. They liked to have dinner together in their chambers. He no longer remembered why a joist conversation had arisen during dinner, and he told Brienne how young Loras Tyrell had knocked him out of the saddle. How she laughed! He waited a long time for her to finally calm down and ask what cheered her up.

“Remember when you said there were barely three fighters in all of Westeros who could defeat you? I hope you included Ser Loras in that list? Well, now you can add the fourth fighter to it - me. At King Renly’s tourney, I stomped into the mud young Tyrell” - she smiled victoriously. – “If you and I had met at the joust, I would have won.”

It was news to Jaime. But he tried to take her down.  
“Actually, the Hound won that tourney.”

And then she laughed again. Jaime realised his mistake. everyone knew how Brienne’s fight with the Hound ended. Brienne stopped laughing, looked sympathetically at his face, stood up, walked around the table, and hugged him from behind. She leaned over and kissed his hair.  
“I will defeat you in battle, you know”, - she whispered in his ear, - “but you can always beat me on another field.”

And he beat her. More than once. Maybe that’s when they conceived this wonderful boy.

Jaime looked at his son’s face, his bright green eyes, he stroked his golden top. They say the child is like one of the parents who is more passionate at the time of conception. Jaime was extremely passionate that night.

“What are you thinking about?” - His son asked.  
Jaime took a breath.

“That you need to train more to please your mother when she gets back.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> But the truth will come out. Just look at the boy, and it’s obvious which family he belongs to. If you want to hide the truth from the rest of the world, you’ll have to put a bag over his head and make him keep quiet. You can’t keep him close to you for long, Brienne, he’s got Lannister and Tart blood boiling in him, and that, as I’m guessing, is quite a mixture.

The raven arrived three days ago. The ship was expected yesterday, but it hadn’t come. 

The storm was raging on the second consecutive day. Jaime was an experienced seaman, and he understood what it could mean. Brienne’s ship was a good, solid ship. Lord Selwyn, as the master of the island, has taken care of the quality of his fleet, but even the best ships sometimes are smashed against the rocks, he knew it very well.

But he did not dare to show his worry - there was a boy who sat beside him whose mother was now somewhere in the raging sea, and he feared to lose her.

“It’s gonna be all right”, - Jaime said once again. Put his hand on his son’s head, stroke the back of his head, the bump’s almost healed, - “doesn’t it hurt?” - He asked.  
The boy shook his head as he continued to stare into the horizon, he moved closer to him, his body shook, whether in cold or fear. Jaime hugged his son with his left hand and held him to himself, the boy’s face was in his chest.  
“Everything will be fine”, - Jaime whispered as the mantra.

The night was approaching.  
“Jaime, you have to go back to the castle”, - the father said kindly. He led his son to the top and made sure he walked through the gate. 

He went back to the cliff where his son said he could see the horizon better. It started raining, but Jaime did not leave his post. He looked in black, hoping to see the lights on the bow of the ship. He kept his troubled thoughts away, didn’t let himself doubt for a moment that she was coming back.

The ship arrived only in the morning, battered, with sails torn and a tired crew. Jaime was standing right there in the harbour, in the shadows of his shop, so as not to be conspicuous. Lady Tarth’s guards also met their mistress, apparently not only Jaime stared into the horizon unabated last night.

She went ashore first, tired, barely standing on her feet. The Guards rushed to meet her.  
“My lady, we’ve prepared a stretcher for you.”  
She refused, she was let down by a horse. She caressed it on the back of the neck, it looked like her favourite mare.

“What about my son?” - It was her first question for the guard.  
“He’s all right, my lady, he’s sleeping, we didn’t wake him.”  
“That’s right, I’ll meet him in the morning. How’s it going in the castle?” - She kept asking, driving by the store.  
“A few hours ago, sir Podrick had a son named Tyrion.”  
“Very nice news. But I’ll congratulate him later. I’m very tired now.”

Jaime watched as the cavalcade pulled away and smiled.   
“Rest, my love. Let today belong to the son.”

He went to his place, now he could finally go to sleep.

*****  
Brienne asked to heat the water, she wanted to wash off the dust, the dirt, and the salt.

“I am at home’, - she thought happily, lying in a warm bath and looking forward to sleeping in her bed, on clean sheets. She thought that when she touched her head on the pillow, she would fall asleep easily, but she couldn’t, after the storm, she was still shaking, her head was full of memories, everything that had happened to her during the last three weeks.

King’s Landing. 

She’s became convinced one more time that she’s not cut out for this town. Now she was perfectly healthy, but the atmosphere of the capital depressed her, and the memory of the tragedy that happened ten years ago, pushed her on her shoulders, restricted her breathing. The splendour of the court, of course, made an impression, but only on someone who does not know how much blood has been spilt in this place. Brienne thought she might never want to go there again.

The king met her with the usual indifferent nod, he as always was in a dimension known only to him, either in the past or in the future. Brienne once again wondered why Tyrion proposed this man as a candidate for the throne. It looked as King Bran had no interest in what was happening now or here, his thoughts were far away.

She dined with the company of the people for whom she came to Sansa and Tyrion.

Sansa. 

Ten years seems to have passed this woman. She was still young and beautiful. Brienne looked into her former lady and tried to find Catelyn Stark in her. When they met, she was not much older than her daughter now. But Sansa was nothing like her mother, there were no kindness and love that Ned Stark’s wife had. Brienne recognized in Sansa the traits of a very different woman, whom she only met once, but remembered forever, Cersei Lannister. As if she was her mother. Superiority, disregard for the dreams and desires of others, a sense of her own greatness and uniqueness, and cruelty - all poisoned and denied any desire to be near her.

“Lady Brienne,” - Sansa turned to Brienne, with a charming but fake smile – “I can’t believe you locked yourself away on the island. Give way to your desires, your dreams, your thirst for adventure. Your child is already big enough, you can place him with Lord Tyrion or my cousin Robin Arryn in the Valley. I offer you service Queen’s Guard in the North’, - the last sentence has been uttered with special solemnity. She was confident that her offer would be accepted.

Brienne looked with regret at the young woman. Troubles and trials leave their mark on people’s souls in different ways, breaking some, making others stronger. Sansa has become an ice queen who lives only by her interests and desires. She does not know what love and motherhood are.

There was a moment, right before the battle with the dead, Brienne felt that one man could warm her frozen heart, a young Greyjoy, but the hope that had been born had faded away when Theon died. And then her heart froze forever.

“Lady Brienne, you have refused to serve my brother, the King of the Six Kingdoms. Perhaps serving the Queen would be more pleasant for you.”  
Brienne shook her head.

“I beg your pardon, Your Grace, but for me, there is only one king, my son. And I will serve him.”  
Brienne empathized with Sansa with all her heart, and she knew that loneliness pushed her to this step. But she couldn’t help. Her heart, her soul, and her whole life now belonged to a boy named Jaime.

She was surprised by Tyrion’s reaction. She thought Sansa and Tyrion were in cahoots because they would both be so comfortable if Brienne gave her son to the Hand, as he wanted six months ago, and went far north, possibly forever. But Lord Lannister only sympathetically nodded to the former Lady Winterfell and tried to shift the conversation. He spoke long and lengthy about the preparations for the Tourney in honour of the Queen of the North, listing the knights who had come to the joust but was unable to dilute the atmosphere of resentment and misunderstanding.

“Ser Brienne’, - he approached her, - ‘perhaps you’d like to take part in the tournament, too? I seem to recall you were once the best fighter in all seven kingdoms.”  
Once upon a time, Brienne would have happily accepted this offer, but now she’s turned it down.

“Alas, my lord, the only battles I have fought in recent years have been with my son. Against a ten-year-old boy, I think I will stand, but against a stronger fighter, hardly’, - she turned on Sansa, - “and that’s another reason why I had to refuse you, Your Grace.”

From that evening, she saw Sansa only once, at the tournament. She politely bowed to Brienne and switched to other people.

They had lunch with Tyrion several times.   
The first time they met after dinner with the Queen, he remembered this conversation.  
“I told Sansa you wouldn’t accept her offer”, - he said, by pouring her a glass of red Dornish, - “but she was somehow convinced otherwise. She doesn’t know you very well.”  
“Do you know me well?” - Brienne smiled at me when she took a glass.  
“Enough to know that family is the most important thing to you. You, as a lioness, take care of your child and do not abandon him”, - he nodded respectfully and raised a glass, - “to you, my lady.”

Brienne drank, the wine was beautiful.  
“And how is our mutual friend, Ser Podrick Payne?’ - asked Tyrion.  
"Very well”, - Brienne replied, - “Ser Podrick’s wife is expecting a third child, and he hopes it will be a boy.”  
“It is incredible how much the children have grown! I remember him as a boy, and now he’s husband and father.”  
“And I must say, my Lord, a very devoted husband, and a loving father”, - noted Brienne and, with a little silence, added, - “a trustworthy man and a good friend”, - they smiled at each other, - “thank you for Podrick.”

“it’s nothing.’ – Tyrion waved his hand but it was seen he was pleased, - “I couldn’t leave you alone in that position. If it weren’t for the Pod, I’d have to escort you to Tarth myself. You were carrying the most valuable cargo back then,” - he winked and continued more seriously – “this boy is of particular value not to you alone, my lady. After my brother’s death, he’s my only relative, my flesh and blood, and I want to take care of him, even from a distance.”

“I take it you’ve abandoned your attempts to take Jaime to the capital?” - She asked.

“No’, - Tyrion was frank, - “I still think there’s no need to hide your son’s origins. He is a Lannister and rightfully heir to Casterly Rock, but I respect your right as a mother to raise your son as you see fit.”  
Brienne nodded while he continued.

“But the truth will come out. Just look at the boy, and it’s obvious which family he belongs to. If you want to hide the truth from the rest of the world, you’ll have to put a bag over his head and make him keep quiet. You can’t keep him close to you for long, Brienne, he’s got Lannister and Tart blood boiling in him, and that, as I’m guessing, is quite a mixture.”

Brienne knew he was right. Neither she nor Jaime ever tolerated restrictions. Their son, too, would not tolerate them.

Tyrion kept ongoing.  
“Sooner or later, your son will know who he is. The only question is who will tell him that truth”

“My son is no longer a little boy who belongs to me alone, and whom I can hide from the cruel world,” - Brienne thought when he went to sleep, - “he will soon become a man. I have to prepare him for those challenges that meet on his way”.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Podrick took his breath away. He knew this man, he saw him many years ago, but the features of his face, hair, figure, and gait are perfectly preserved in his memory. The only thing missing was the gold hand on his right arm, which now ended up just being a stump.  
> “To be honest, I didn’t think you’d come today”, - he welcomed the boy.  
> That was his voice!  
> Podrick sensed a pinch in his eyes. Jaime Lannister was standing there with his apprentice, alive.

Brienne woke up by a knock on the door.

“Mother, may I come in?” - she heard Jaime’s voice at the door.

She got up in a hurry, put on her robe, and opened the door. Her sweet boy, how he’s grown! Although she hasn’t seen him for only three weeks! She kissed those beloved green eyes, ran her hand through his naughty golden hair until he got tired of it, and remembered he was a big boy.

“Mother, I’ve been sitting at your door all morning waiting for you to wake up! And then I thought it was lunchtime soon and I thought I’d wake you up. Are you not hungry?”

Brienne was really hungry, she hadn’t eaten for two days, during the whole storm they had no time for eating.  
“I’m starving, my dear. I’ll be down in the dining room in half an hour, but in the meantime could call in the measter?”   
Tyrion asked her to let him know when she gets home.

At lunch, her son filled her with questions about her life in the capital and, of course, about the tourney.  
“Mother, did you participate in the joust?”  
“No, my dear, I’m in no shape to fight anymore.”  
“You need more training, Mother, then you’ll be a strong fighter again!”  
“You’re right, my dear,” - Brienne agreed.- “ It’s been a while since we’ve been training together.”

The boy jumped out of the table and joyfully ran down, training with his mother was not frequent, but a favourite activity of young Jaime. By the time Brienne walked into the courtyard, he had already met her with training swords, one of which he gave to his mother.

“Oh! I see you did not waste your time”, - said Brienne when she looked at the sword. It was badly scratched, even slightly bent, - “this sword was used every day?”  
“Even twice a day’, - her son said proudly, - “I’ve been doing a lot of training and I’m going to show you something.”

Jaime held a sword in his left hand.  
“Take the sword right”, - Brienne’s remarked.  
The boy shook his head.  
“No,’ - her son answered, - “now I am learning to fight with my left hand. And I’ll show you. Attack me!”  
Brienne, to her son’s disappointment, was in no hurry to attack, she looked him in the eye with suspicion.  
“Why are you fighting with your left hand?”  
“If someone cuts my right, I have to be able to protect my loved ones.”

Brienne froze.  
“What do you know about the severed hand?”

The boy looked confused as if he’d accidentally told something he didn’t have to say.  
“Well, there are times when a knight loses a hand in battle,” - he turned out.  
“Yes. Sometimes it happens”, - Brienne agrees and gives an angry look at Podrick, - “so show me what you’ve learned.”

She began to attack her son with caution, and he repelled the blows. To her surprise, the boy was quite confident, and then even went into the attack. Brienne was impressed.

“You did well’, - she praised her son, then she appealed to his mentor, - “Podrick you’re a great teacher.”  
“I’m sorry, my lady, but I didn’t teach Lord Jaime to fight with his left hand.”

Brienne turned to her son.  
“Who taught you?”  
The boy sighed, it was seen he didn’t want to answer.  
“I’m waiting’, - his mother’s voice was very strict.  
He had no choice but, to tell the truth.  
“I have a friend, he’s a former seaman, his name is Bran. He doesn’t have a right hand, but he’s very good at fighting with his left. He taught me.”

Brienne looked closely at her son.  
“I have a lot of work to do, and I’m going to leave to my cabinet. You can rest, my dear,” - she called Podrick, - “I want to know who is training my son.”

*****  
Podrick Payne left the castle gate and turned onto the path that led to the sea. He walked it more than once, searching for his little lord. And now, he was sure the boy was walking down ahead. He went out to the beach, but it was empty. Strangely enough, the path descended through the rocks and the stones, and there was nowhere else he could go. There was an open beach on the left, all the way to the port, and if the boy had gone there, he would have been visible. On the right, there was a steep rock that the boys used to jump into the water.

Podrick climbed the cliff, opposite the side of port on the steep shore, another path ran, and his apprentice walked on it. A minute later, his golden top flickered among the bushes on the edge of the cliff and disappeared. Podrick rushed there. Among the bushes, he noticed a descent to the sea, and a small site opened up to his gaze. On a large boulder under the very cliff, a man was waiting for someone. When young Jaime came down, the man, hearing the stones rustling beneath his feet, stood up and walked towards him.

Podrick took his breath away. He knew this man, he saw him many years ago, but the features of his face, hair, figure, and gait are perfectly preserved in his memory. The only thing missing was the gold hand on his right arm, which now ended up just being a stump.  
“To be honest, I didn’t think you’d come today”, - he welcomed the boy.  
That was his voice!  
Podrick sensed a pinch in his eyes. Jaime Lannister was standing there with his apprentice, alive.

“Mother returned!” - the boy reported happily.  
“I know”, - Ser Jaime smiled. – “I saw her ship dock. Are you happy?” - he asked his son.

The boy nodded gladly, then talked seriously.

“I’m sorry to you.”  
“What is it about?”  
“I gave away our secret. My mother asked me what I had learned while she was gone, and I joyfully showed her how I can fight with my left hand”. - The boy’s face was full of remorse. – “Are you angry with me?”

Older Jaime shook his head.  
“No, you couldn’t hide it all your life. Now it’s time to reveal our secret. Better tell me, did she like it?”  
“Yes, she praised me and asked who taught me. I told her about you”, - the last thing the boy said was quiet, fearing his teacher’s frustration.  
But he shrugged his shoulders.  
“Don’t punish yourself. That’s alright. We’d better train since you’re here.”

They started training, and Podrick stood behind a tree, listening to the conversation between a father and his son, and cried quietly. Jaime Lannister is alive! He sympathized with both the Lannister brothers, Lord Tyrion and Ser Jaime, they were always kind to him; he knew how deep his Lady Brienne’s love for Ser Jaime was, how hard for her was to morn his loss, and how little Jaime had suffered without his father. Now, it turns out Ser Jaime is alive, he’s back, and now everyone will be happy, Lord Tyrion and Lady Brienne and, of course, his dear apprentice.

Podrick thought his lady was waiting for him with the news, but he couldn’t move. There was a struggle of loyalty to both of them, and something told him that it would be wrong for him to return to the castle now and betray Ser Jaime. He waited until his nerves had calmed down, wiped the tears of joy, and started coming down. 

The two who fought on the beach were so passionate about the fight that they didn’t notice that Podrick had approached them. The boy first saw him, he lowered his sword and stared at the mentor.  
“Ser Podrick?”  
Ser Jaime turned around. He was discouraged by the appearance of an old acquaintance, but quickly found and bowed to him, accompanied by his signature smile.  
“Ser Podrick.”

Payne in return bowed, he did not call him by name, suspecting that his acquaintance wanted to preserve incognito.  
“Lord Jaime, your mother asks you to return to the castle.”

The boy stood next to his father, his father’s hand on his shoulder, he looked back, asking for his opinion.  
Jaime Lannister caressed his son’s hair.

“Listen to your mentor, go to your mother. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

The boy took both swords and rushed to the castle. When he fled behind the juniper bush, Podrick was no longer able to restrain himself, he happily hugged the resurrected Lannister.

“Ser Jaime”, - the tears are pouring out of his eyes again. – “I’m so happy!”


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What do I do now, Podrick?”
> 
> The young man shrugged, he did what he could - told Jaime what he knew. But he wanted to help, so he offered.
> 
> “I think, Ser Jaime, you need to go to my lady and you two will decide what to do next.”

Brienne watched as her son, with two swords under his arm, came out of the castle gate, followed by Podrick, who waited a few minutes. I should wait, she told herself, and went to her office, it’s better to have something to do.

There was a lot of paperwork on the table, she had to revise the accounts and answer the letters, but the job didn’t work. Who was this person? Maybe her son’s right, there’s a lot of cripples in the country, with no arms, no legs. The probability of encountering one among them without a right hand is high. There may be a some hedge knight among them who could fight with his left hand and who wishes to share his skills with the highborn lady’s son. She wouldn’t be surprised if a man like that came to the castle and offered his services for a fee, but to do it for free and secretly from everyone? Who could do that and why? In her brain, there was an answer, who could it be, but she immediately distanced herself from that thought. That can’t be true, she saw the golden hand crumpled by rocks, the ties with which it was attached to the arm were torn and stained with blood as if that hand had been torn off from the place where it was attached. His body wasn’t found, but near where the hand lay, was Cersei’s body and huge rubble that blocked the entrance to the dungeon. There was no doubt he was buried under that rubble.

Brienne stood up and walked around the room, she couldn’t find her place. How slowly time passed, why didn’t Podrick come back? She decided to leave the room and distract herself by talking to someone. But before she could get to the door, her son walked in. He was still holding two swords under his arm, his boots were caked with sand, his hair was ruffled and wet with sweat, he obviously was in a hurry.

“Did you call for me, Mother?”

“Podrick said that I wanted to see him”, - Brienne guessed, - “I have to come up with something.” 

That’s when she remembered her morning conversation with the maester and made a tough face.

“Maester Conleth isn’t happy with you, you haven’t studied much, and yesterday you were rude. I’m waiting for an explanation.”

Jaime looked right into his mother’s eyes.  
“I was not rude, Mother, but simply reminded that it is not customary in our house to pronounce the word "Kingslayer”.

Brienne’s getting a little tense. She still hadn’t decided if her son would know who Jaime Lannister was for him, but she made sure that this name in his mind was connected to the image of a true knight and a man of honour.

“I forbade the use of that word”, - she said strictly.

“That’s what I said. But the Maester noticed that it is written in the book “The Song of Ice and Fire”, which was given to me at my name day”, - the boy silenced a bit and, lowering his voice, added, - “it really says so, Mother”.

Brienne sighs. Will she live to see this unjust charge dropped? When will the world finally know what Jaime Lannister really was? What did he do?

She called her son.

“The Archmaester who wrote the book, in all his years, has never stuck his nose out of the Citadel. But I was out there in the thick of things, and I saw those people, I talked to them, as I’m talking to you now. Do you believe me?”

The boy nodded.

“Yes, Mother, I do”.

All the matters her son believed her.

“Tell the maester to bring me that book.”

He’s headed for the exit.

“And call Ser Podrick, I want to talk to him,” - she called to her son.

Jaime turned around.  
“I don’t know where Sir Podrick is. He found us on the beach and told me to go back home. But he stayed there. I think he wanted to talk to Bran.”

Brienne was worried sick.

“To talk about what?”

“I don’t know”, - her son’s shrugged, – “but” - the boy hesitated, - “It seems to me they know each other.”

*****  
Podrick’s heartfelt joy moved Jaime and made him cry, too.

He slapped on the shoulders of a long-time acquaintance.

“Ser Jaime, you’re alive”, - Podrick kept saying, - “everyone thought you were perished by the bricks. How did you escape? Where have you been all these years?”

“It’s a long story, Pod”, - replied Jaime, - “let’s continue our talking in a quiet place with a bottle of ale.”

They headed to the inn where Jaime lived. On the way, he told a former squire about his adventures.

The dining room was empty. They took the far table in the corner, Jaime filled the goblets and asked the main question.

“How did she survive all this, Pod?”

A former squire frowned.

“It was hard.” - He sighed, - “during the first few days, I was afraid to approach her, she was angry at everyone, was very aggressive, and cried at nights. She was hiding it, but I knew.”  
Jaime’s heart shrunk. Poor Brienne, she tried to hide her pain from everyone under the mask of aggression.

“Then, I thought, she calmed down a bit,’ - Pod continued, - “at least she communicated with me. But soon the news of your death came. I thought aggression was bad, but indifference was much worse. I think the Night King had more emotion than she did. I already wanted her to yell at me, even beat me, just so she’d spill the pain that was eating away at her.”

Jaime drank one cup and immediately the second. It was really hard for her, she’s not the kind of person to share her feelings, nor anyone to share them with. Unless it was Podrick.

“She didn’t even talk to you?”

The young man shook his head.

“I tried a couple of times, but the only response was silence. And then we went to King’s Landing. And along the way, she began to unfreeze. We were sailing from White Harbor, and I think the sea cheered her up.”

“Sea, - Jaime thought, looking at the scattering water glance outside the window, - I also was healed by the sea”.

“She was appointed Lord Commander’, - Payne’s story continued, - “I know she used to dream about it, so I thought that’s where it would go well. But I was wrong again. She stopped eating, became pale and thin. I thought she was dying, sir”.

“This was just when I was thinking of going back to Westeros”, - remembered Jaime, - “if I hadn’t been so stupid and went back then."  
'  
“We convinced her into going to the maester, and then she got better”. - Podrick looked at Jaime carefully, as if to wonder whether he had the right to say what he wanted, and yet decided to – “the child saved her, Sir Jamie. I’m sure if it wasn’t for him, she’d be dead.”

Jaime drank another cup and covered his face with his palm. He’d never been so disgusting to himself as now. Brienne, so kind, pure, caring, and loving. He’s never met a brighter person in his life. He was blessed with the joy of being loved by this wonderful woman, and so despicably betrayed all her hopes. How wrong he was to think she forgot him and moved on. How could he have lived for ten years without even wondering what was with her? And what if she really had died?

“Ser Jaime’, - he heard Pod's voice, raised his head, his eyes were full of tears.

Podrick set up a plate of meat for him.

“Eat something, or you’ll get completely drunk.”

Jaime automatically took a piece and put it in his mouth. It didn’t taste. It was just a thought in his head: “I’m an idiot”. He sighed and turned helplessly to Payne.

“What do I do now, Podrick?”

The young man shrugged, he did what he could - told Jaime what he knew. But he wanted to help, so he offered.

“I think, Ser Jaime, you need to go to my lady and you two will decide what to do next.”


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The blood was boiling in Brienne’s veins. How many nights she spent without sleep, thinking of him, dreaming that he would return. She forgave him when he left her alone on a cold winter night. She even made up an excuse for him, believing that the scary words he had told her good-bye had been saying for one reason only so that she would not follow him to King’s Landing. She told herself that he had gone to rescue his sister. After all, he couldn’t forgive himself if she was killed because his family was very important to him. And how she mourned his death. She really wanted to die then. If it wasn’t for the son. His son, whom he didn’t want to know for ten years! He’s been alive and well for ten years, but now he’s suddenly out of nowhere. For what?

Brienne sat still at her desk, she couldn’t even breathe. Who could this man be? Of course, it could have been someone Podrick knew from the port or the village nearby. But why didn’t he recognize him from the description when her son was talking about his teacher? No, she doesn’t have the strength to wait any longer, and she goes there immediately.

Brienne was barely able to control herself when she crossed the castle’s courtyard, she wanted to run as fast as she could, but she just walked away smiling and even answering questions she had not heard.

After turning beyond the gates of the castle onto the path she used to walk to the beach as a child, she started running. She was rushing down, the branches of the trees were whipping at her cheeks, she stumbled on the rocks and almost fell, finally she reached the big boulder, bypassing which, already, she could see the beach. Brienne stopped, breathing hard, leaning her back against a rock, tears running down her cheeks. 

“Calm down, Brienne”, - she ordered herself, - “no one should see that you were in a hurry. You’re just looking for your servant who’s been delayed on a mission.”  
“Now I will see him,” - she thought.

Who was she hoping to see there? She couldn’t answer herself. Maybe it was just some stranger. But the amount of coincidence was disturbing to her. She thought about him, about that man who for ten years came to her in her dreams and wouldn’t let her go. 

“Jaime”, - she whispered. 

Could it be him? And if it was, was she in no hurry to be happy? Why did he just disappear for ten years and not even intend to show up? Maybe it’s all her stupid fantasies? How many times did she think she could hear his voice? How many times did she see a tall, blonde man in the crowd, and she was ready to follow him? Now she’s going to go to the beach and see for herself.  
Brienne rounded the stone. 

The shore opened to her eyes was empty.

If they were here, they’ve already left. 

Where can two men, who haven’t seen each other for a while and have something to talk about, go? 

She’s headed towards the port, and there’s plenty of taverns to sit and drink. The closer she got to the port, the more people she met. Almost all of them recognized their lady and bowed affably, although she was sure they asked themselves what Lady Tarth was doing alone in the port and why was she coming from the side of the beach? Brienne smiled back and sincerely hoped that her appearance did not reveal her unrest. The first establishment in her way was the inn that belonged to the widow Marika. That’s when Brienne realized how stupid her plan was to go into every place and see if there was the one she was looking for. Fortunately, the door opened, and a man appeared to Brienne seemed to be an acquaintance, she remembered his name was Sam.

“Good evening, my lady”, - he welcomed her.

There’s a reason to talk!

“Hello, Sam’, - Brienne gave him a nice smile, - “a lovely evening. I’ve lost my companion, Ser Podrick. Have you seen him?”

“Of course I have, My Lady. There he is, having a drink with old Bran”, - answered her interlocutor by waving to the establishment where he had just come from. – “They’re sitting at a table in the corner.”

He called this Bran as they say about an old friend. Brienne wondered how long he’d been on the island?

Brienne knew she couldn’t wait, she’d be suspicious if she didn’t go in there, and she walked in.

There weren’t many people in the dining room, she didn’t need to remember which table Pod was sitting at, she recognized the other person. His lean back, the way he was moving, his straight golden hair... Brienne’s feet filled with lead, heart stopped. He’s alive, he’s here, but he doesn’t want to see her.

“You don’t understand, Podrick”,- there was a voice she didn’t confuse with anyone else – “I’m Jaime Lannister” - he was obviously drunk – “I never feared of anyone in my life. And now I’m afraid! I’m afraid of the woman I betrayed, who had been raising my son alone for ten years. She’ll never forgive me.”

The blood was boiling in Brienne’s veins. How many nights she spent without sleep, thinking of him, dreaming that he would return. She forgave him when he left her alone on a cold winter night. She even made up an excuse for him, believing that the scary words he had told her good-bye had been saying for one reason only so that she would not follow him to King’s Landing. She told herself that he had gone to rescue his sister. After all, he couldn’t forgive himself if she was killed because his family was very important to him. And how she mourned his death. She really wanted to die then. If it wasn’t for the son. His son, whom he didn’t want to know for ten years! He’s been alive and well for ten years, but now he’s suddenly out of nowhere. For what?

She walked through the dining room with determination. The two of them were so drunk that they didn’t even see her coming. She stood behind his back. Pod raised his eyes and his jaw fell off.

“My lady?” - he asked surprised.

She didn’t even see it, she felt his drinking buddy strain.

“Ser Podrick” - she turned to her servant, choosing to ignore another man – “why is my son wandering the island with some strangers?”

But he jumped up, turned around so they were facing each other.

“He’s my son too.”

“You don’t have a son, sailor Bran.” – she answered coldly.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Jaime’, - she said. At that moment, both of the owners of that name turned towards her. Despite the solemnity of the moment, it seemed amusing to her. She clarified, - “my son, meet your father, Jaime Lannister.”

It was a slap in the face, and it was well deserved. Jaime understood that. He was aware that there would probably be no happy meeting, he would have to explain and justify for a long time, but he didn’t think it would happen this way, that she wouldn’t even let him say one word of his defence? He took a big breath.

It was dead of night out the window, but Jaime couldn’t sleep. That’s not how he painted their first encounter. But after everything he’d heard from Podrick, he realized that he didn’t imagine half the horror that Brienne had to endure. Her grievance was just, he admitted. He’s got a lot of work to do to win her back.

He decided to come to the castle in the morning, but not too soon - after breakfast when his son had already gone to his lessons. They need to talk in private first. He got ready carefully, dressed for the best, today he won’t be some drifter named Bran, he’ll be coming into the castle under his own name. The only way. He understood that for his Brienne, who valued honesty and courage so much, it was incomprehensible that he was called a false name. That is why she uttered his false name with such contempt. Jaime added a final stroke to his image, a brooch with the emblem of the Tarth family. That night, when he fled Winterfell, he stole it from Brienne and carried it with him gently for ten years. Today, he put it on his chest, hoping that his beloved, seeing the brooch, would realize that she had been in his heart all those years.

He rode into the gates of the castle, threw the reins to the servant who ran up and dismounted.

“How do I report you, my lord?” - A servant asked.  
“Tell your lady Ser Jaime Lannister is here to speak to her.”

As he walked up the stairs, he saw a familiar face in the gallery - Podrick smiled cheerfully, he nodded thankfully to him, at least one person in this castle is on his side.

Brienne was sitting in her office trying to do a job she didn’t finish yesterday when she was told he was coming.

Jaime Lannister? Looks like he’s out in the open.

Jaime entered and stand in front of her. He’d prepared a long speech, but the only thing he could squeeze out was “Brienne!” 

At last, he could see her: she was still as tall, but the man-like angular figure of her had changed, her body had gained a nice female roundness, she had grown her hair to her shoulders, he did not know that they were wavy. He silently looked at her, she waited too. He had to start somewhere.

“Are we going to keep our mouths shut?” - He asked, coming closer.  
“You came to my house so you are going to speak,” - her voice was as cold as the breath of the Night King.

Jaime got closer and started his speech.  
“I owe you an apology. But I came to ask for forgiveness.”  
“You were gone too long.” - He’s been reproached before, but today it was really served. – “You thought you’d just show up and I’d forget everything?”  
“I’m not asking you to forget. But let me redeem myself to you and our son.”  
“I told you, you don’t have a son. That boy is not yours.”

Jaime was confused at first, but then, realizing what she meant, laughed.  
“Whose is he, pray, tell? Is he Tormund Giantbane’s?”

Brienne was embarrassed, that was exactly what she wanted to say because there was no other claimant for her heart at that time.

Jaime, laughing, approached the table at which Brienne was sitting, with his hands on the table, and leaned towards her.

“You’re not the kind of woman who jumps from bed to bed, Brienne, this boy can only be mine. And whatever you’re up to right now, the facts are against you: he’s ten years old, you named him by my name, you gave him my sword, and above all, we look like two peas. I knew he was my son the minute I saw him.”

Brienne had no choice but to admit he was right.

“It doesn’t change anything. You’ve been gone for ten years, you’re not actually his father.”  
“But I want to be.”

She rose sharply, resentment took hold of her, she realized about his plans.

“But why now? When he turned ten and he became a big boy? I get it: first, you send your brother, and when I say no, you decide to do what Tyrion couldn’t. You - Lannisters are very cunning, but you know I’m stubborn and you can’t beat me.”

“So that’s what she’s afraid of!” – it hit Jaime.  
“Brienne, sweetling,” - he tried to speak calmly – “do you think I want to take our son away from you? No, I know how much he loves and respects you. You’re a great mother, and I never meant to separate you.”

“A real lioness protecting her cub”, - he thought, - “she behaves like a true Lannister, though she does not realize this.”

“I understand your anger, I even admit that you may not forgive me and send me away, after all, you have a right. But Jaime needs to know he has a father. And if you don’t tell him, I will.”

Brienne wanted to object, but before she had time, the door opened, and their son walked into the room. He froze in the door surprised.

“Bran?” - He exclaimed.

Jaime walked behind Brienne and passing her he leaned toward her and whispered,  
“It’s a good time, don’t you think?” - He stood next to her and looked her in the face, raised his eyebrow.  
Brienne took a heavy breath. She herself knew this day would come, she would have to tell her son his father’s name, but she wasn’t ready for it to happen so soon.

“Jaime’, - she said. At that moment, both of the owners of that name turned towards her. Despite the solemnity of the moment, it seemed amusing to her. She clarified, - “my son, meet your father, Jaime Lannister.”

The boy’s reaction was unexpected. He ran to Jaime and threw himself at him.

“Father! I waited so long for you” I knew it was you.”

Jaime held his son tightly, patting him on the back, turned to Brienne, and stared at her. He hoped his son would be happy with him, but this reaction surprised him.

Brienne was also frustrated, she had no idea her son was so desperate for a father.

The boy looked into Jaime’s face, he cried and laughed at the same time.  
“Father, will you stay with us now?” - He spoke with hope.

Jaime turned to Brienne.  
“If your mother will allow it.”

Brienne was biting her lips, trying to hold back the tears. She didn’t know where it would lead, but she couldn’t refuse her son.

I’ll order to get ready the chambers for your father.”


End file.
